mesothelioma-Saturday Again- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Saturday Again- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Saturday Again- JUSTICEWORLD

Well the sun was shining at 6 am but by 10 the clouds have come across and rain looks heavy on the horizon.

 

My GP and lung nurse both phoned with the MRI results, thankfully, and I mean thankfully, the meso isn't affecting my back.  I have a protruding disc between EL4 & 5 which has trapped my nerve root.  I have no idea whether they can manipulate this back in but I hope so.  I don't particularly want to spend the rest of my days in agony with this as well as the blasted meso.

 

Can't help but write that I am feeling rock bottom, with the loss of both Debbie and Helen this brings it home to us that we won't last till our old age but will be taken long before we are due.  It isn't fair that I won't get to claim my pension or become one of those old relatives you want to lock up in a cupboard. 

 

Our beautiful Meso Warrior Lou is also facing up to trying new treatments, a risky one too, having had everything on offer her meso just doesn't know when to quit either and on Monday is going to see about a new radical treatment.  I hope the information is good but more so the risks aren't too big endangering her life.

 

I would like to have attended both funerals of my friends but getting to Plymouth is out of the question at the moment, a long trip when sitting for an hour is all I can do, but I had hoped to hop onto a train to Runcorn for Helen's, under instructions from Barry I am to stay at home and get better for my holiday.  I guess Helen would have said the same.

 

Time I moved my body and went with hubby and mutts across the woods, hopefully moving my body will get my leg working properly and I may improve in mood!

 

I hope you have a good weekend, wherever you are.

Well the sun was shining at 6 am but by 10 the clouds have come across and rain looks heavy on the horizon.

 

My GP and lung nurse both phoned with the MRI results, thankfully, and I mean thankfully, the meso isn't affecting my back.  I have a protruding disc between EL4 & 5 which has trapped my nerve root.  I have no idea whether they can manipulate this back in but I hope so.  I don't particularly want to spend the rest of my days in agony with this as well as the blasted meso.

 

Can't help but write that I am feeling rock bottom, with the loss of both Debbie and Helen this brings it home to us that we won't last till our old age but will be taken long before we are due.  It isn't fair that I won't get to claim my pension or become one of those old relatives you want to lock up in a cupboard. 

 

Our beautiful Meso Warrior Lou is also facing up to trying new treatments, a risky one too, having had everything on offer her meso just doesn't know when to quit either and on Monday is going to see about a new radical treatment.  I hope the information is good but more so the risks aren't too big endangering her life.

 

I would like to have attended both funerals of my friends but getting to Plymouth is out of the question at the moment, a long trip when sitting for an hour is all I can do, but I had hoped to hop onto a train to Runcorn for Helen's, under instructions from Barry I am to stay at home and get better for my holiday.  I guess Helen would have said the same.

 

Time I moved my body and went with hubby and mutts across the woods, hopefully moving my body will get my leg working properly and I may improve in mood!

 

I hope you have a good weekend, wherever you are.

Well the sun was shining at 6 am but by 10 the clouds have come across and rain looks heavy on the horizon.

 

My GP and lung nurse both phoned with the MRI results, thankfully, and I mean thankfully, the meso isn't affecting my back.  I have a protruding disc between EL4 & 5 which has trapped my nerve root.  I have no idea whether they can manipulate this back in but I hope so.  I don't particularly want to spend the rest of my days in agony with this as well as the blasted meso.

 

Can't help but write that I am feeling rock bottom, with the loss of both Debbie and Helen this brings it home to us that we won't last till our old age but will be taken long before we are due.  It isn't fair that I won't get to claim my pension or become one of those old relatives you want to lock up in a cupboard. 

 

Our beautiful Meso Warrior Lou is also facing up to trying new treatments, a risky one too, having had everything on offer her meso just doesn't know when to quit either and on Monday is going to see about a new radical treatment.  I hope the information is good but more so the risks aren't too big endangering her life.

 

I would like to have attended both funerals of my friends but getting to Plymouth is out of the question at the moment, a long trip when sitting for an hour is all I can do, but I had hoped to hop onto a train to Runcorn for Helen's, under instructions from Barry I am to stay at home and get better for my holiday.  I guess Helen would have said the same.

 

Time I moved my body and went with hubby and mutts across the woods, hopefully moving my body will get my leg working properly and I may improve in mood!

 

I hope you have a good weekend, wherever you are.

mesothelioma-A visit to MKMRF Head Quarters- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-A visit to MKMRF Head Quarters- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-A visit to MKMRF Head Quarters- JUSTICEWORLD

Finally I managed to catch up with the hardworking Chris Knighton at her offices in Wallsend.  I've known Chris since 2005 when The Northern Echo posted an article on her and the charity she set up on behalf of her late husband.

 

Although she started as a coffee morning to support those diagnosed with our cancer she saw the need for research and has fought tooth and nail for us to ensure money is used for research in the hope that something can be found to help.  She also wanted the danger of asbestos to be known and has campaigned tirelessly for this.

 

It was an easy decision for me to dedicate the book to MKMR, I love writing and if it can possibly raise money then nothing could be better.

 

Chris will be selling 'The DreamWeaver's Choice' at the Strawberry Fair on 13th July as well as at the Newcastle Action Day.  Unfortunately I won't be there as we will be on holiday for both.

 

 

 

We need to support our Charities, too many can dilute the funds causing less to be actually done.  It is good to know that in the case of Mesothelioma there are a few only, MKMRF, The June Hancock and Mesothelioma UK, each one working in different areas but all for the same aim, to help us with Mesothelioma.

 

So back to Chris, even hubby came too and after carrying the to boxes into the hospital we had to drag Chris away from her work load to have a cup of tea and a scone.  The coffee shop in the GB Hunter hospital is really old fashioned, the food excellent, all served on china.

 

It was lovely to hear how she met the queen but as her schedule was busy I didn't want to take too much of her precious time up.   I don't know where she gets the energy from, yesterday she was up early and away for her meeting with the scientific board.  No doubt tomorrow she is off doing something else.  I know that it was today only she had enough free time for a catch up.

 

I know she will do well when she speaks in Parliament on our behalf in July.  I hope this time those MP's don't fall asleep or walk out like they did when the last Bill was read.

 

 

 

 

Finally I managed to catch up with the hardworking Chris Knighton at her offices in Wallsend.  I've known Chris since 2005 when The Northern Echo posted an article on her and the charity she set up on behalf of her late husband.

 

Although she started as a coffee morning to support those diagnosed with our cancer she saw the need for research and has fought tooth and nail for us to ensure money is used for research in the hope that something can be found to help.  She also wanted the danger of asbestos to be known and has campaigned tirelessly for this.

 

It was an easy decision for me to dedicate the book to MKMR, I love writing and if it can possibly raise money then nothing could be better.

 

Chris will be selling 'The DreamWeaver's Choice' at the Strawberry Fair on 13th July as well as at the Newcastle Action Day.  Unfortunately I won't be there as we will be on holiday for both.

 

 

 

We need to support our Charities, too many can dilute the funds causing less to be actually done.  It is good to know that in the case of Mesothelioma there are a few only, MKMRF, The June Hancock and Mesothelioma UK, each one working in different areas but all for the same aim, to help us with Mesothelioma.

 

So back to Chris, even hubby came too and after carrying the to boxes into the hospital we had to drag Chris away from her work load to have a cup of tea and a scone.  The coffee shop in the GB Hunter hospital is really old fashioned, the food excellent, all served on china.

 

It was lovely to hear how she met the queen but as her schedule was busy I didn't want to take too much of her precious time up.   I don't know where she gets the energy from, yesterday she was up early and away for her meeting with the scientific board.  No doubt tomorrow she is off doing something else.  I know that it was today only she had enough free time for a catch up.

 

I know she will do well when she speaks in Parliament on our behalf in July.  I hope this time those MP's don't fall asleep or walk out like they did when the last Bill was read.

 

 

 

 

Finally I managed to catch up with the hardworking Chris Knighton at her offices in Wallsend.  I've known Chris since 2005 when The Northern Echo posted an article on her and the charity she set up on behalf of her late husband.

 

Although she started as a coffee morning to support those diagnosed with our cancer she saw the need for research and has fought tooth and nail for us to ensure money is used for research in the hope that something can be found to help.  She also wanted the danger of asbestos to be known and has campaigned tirelessly for this.

 

It was an easy decision for me to dedicate the book to MKMR, I love writing and if it can possibly raise money then nothing could be better.

 

Chris will be selling 'The DreamWeaver's Choice' at the Strawberry Fair on 13th July as well as at the Newcastle Action Day.  Unfortunately I won't be there as we will be on holiday for both.

 

 

 

We need to support our Charities, too many can dilute the funds causing less to be actually done.  It is good to know that in the case of Mesothelioma there are a few only, MKMRF, The June Hancock and Mesothelioma UK, each one working in different areas but all for the same aim, to help us with Mesothelioma.

 

So back to Chris, even hubby came too and after carrying the to boxes into the hospital we had to drag Chris away from her work load to have a cup of tea and a scone.  The coffee shop in the GB Hunter hospital is really old fashioned, the food excellent, all served on china.

 

It was lovely to hear how she met the queen but as her schedule was busy I didn't want to take too much of her precious time up.   I don't know where she gets the energy from, yesterday she was up early and away for her meeting with the scientific board.  No doubt tomorrow she is off doing something else.  I know that it was today only she had enough free time for a catch up.

 

I know she will do well when she speaks in Parliament on our behalf in July.  I hope this time those MP's don't fall asleep or walk out like they did when the last Bill was read.

 

 

 

 

mesothelioma-For Helen- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-For Helen- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-For Helen- JUSTICEWORLD

A lovely photograph of a lovely lady.  Helen & Barry met up with Gary and I when we were all in LA back in 2011. 

 

In all the years I have been fighting I never thought I would still be here and both Helen and Debbie would have lost the battle before me.  Helen had surgery and thankfully was lucky enough not to have the same amount of pain from it as I.  She lived her life to the full with her wonderful husband Barry. 

 

My heart sank yesterday when Barry rang, I knew the moment his name came up on the mobile phone it was bad news.  My thoughts and prays are with Barry and his wonderful family and I truly hope that the 2 weeks the family spent out in LA will be one of the best times they had.  Renting a house where all the rich and famous live in town.

 

Another warrior also died yesterday, Colin Walker, he was only in his late 40's, he leaves behind a young family too.

 

These deaths are shameful, this cancer is criminal and yet asbestos is still used today.  Yes I am angry, I have grieved for two friends in a matter of days.

A lovely photograph of a lovely lady.  Helen & Barry met up with Gary and I when we were all in LA back in 2011. 

 

In all the years I have been fighting I never thought I would still be here and both Helen and Debbie would have lost the battle before me.  Helen had surgery and thankfully was lucky enough not to have the same amount of pain from it as I.  She lived her life to the full with her wonderful husband Barry. 

 

My heart sank yesterday when Barry rang, I knew the moment his name came up on the mobile phone it was bad news.  My thoughts and prays are with Barry and his wonderful family and I truly hope that the 2 weeks the family spent out in LA will be one of the best times they had.  Renting a house where all the rich and famous live in town.

 

Another warrior also died yesterday, Colin Walker, he was only in his late 40's, he leaves behind a young family too.

 

These deaths are shameful, this cancer is criminal and yet asbestos is still used today.  Yes I am angry, I have grieved for two friends in a matter of days.

A lovely photograph of a lovely lady.  Helen & Barry met up with Gary and I when we were all in LA back in 2011. 

 

In all the years I have been fighting I never thought I would still be here and both Helen and Debbie would have lost the battle before me.  Helen had surgery and thankfully was lucky enough not to have the same amount of pain from it as I.  She lived her life to the full with her wonderful husband Barry. 

 

My heart sank yesterday when Barry rang, I knew the moment his name came up on the mobile phone it was bad news.  My thoughts and prays are with Barry and his wonderful family and I truly hope that the 2 weeks the family spent out in LA will be one of the best times they had.  Renting a house where all the rich and famous live in town.

 

Another warrior also died yesterday, Colin Walker, he was only in his late 40's, he leaves behind a young family too.

 

These deaths are shameful, this cancer is criminal and yet asbestos is still used today.  Yes I am angry, I have grieved for two friends in a matter of days.

mesothelioma-The normal 'ATypical' and Out of Evidence Zone- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-The normal 'ATypical' and Out of Evidence Zone- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-The normal 'ATypical' and Out of Evidence Zone- JUSTICEWORLD

Yesterday some 8 weeks after my scan I saw my oncologist.  I wish they would read what they say before seeing us again sometimes as I always feel like I am starting from square one in some areas.

 

Ok, the results are mixed, I have meso back around the pericardium, not the 7mm growth right around which the chemo knocked out, but it has regrown, so those slight heavy pains I have had recently tie in. Thank God though no fluid has collected their, although I have two lots of fluid areas in my chest now.

 

I have a couple of large tumours that have changed together with some new nodules and lymph nodes, while others have remained static.  My right lung has undergone changes, the mesothelioma in their has decided to grow again, although only slightly, but growing. 

 

Some of these growths would be ideal to have done with cryoablation because they are singular long tumours but it isn't a practise we have in this country so they will just keep growing.  I asked about the size of the thickening at the bottom of the lung but as he was going to measure it he found another lump so diverted the conversation, leaving me without an answer.

 

Treatment, well it was the 'you are in a Evidence Free Zone, no one has had your length of time with the treatments you have had.'  Together with having 'ATypical' mesothelioma.  He said that trying again with Alimta wasn't a good idea, at 50% I had a reaction and if he went any higher he would kill me.  I told him I thought it was the platins, but he then said because I have had Alimta 3 times it wouldn't make any difference as it hasn't held back the old stuff?  Confused - me too. 

 

I suggested trying Gemcitabine, as Mavis is trying this, he said he wasn't able to give this unless he had further backing.  He said last time he was going to discuss my case with J Steele so I reminded him.  He may get round to it over the next four months.

 

I then said I wouldn't be interested in treatment until at least September at the earliest, although I would hope it was September 14 not this year, unless I took a dramatic turn for the worst.  I said it would be better if they infused me again the time the mesothelioma was growing.  He struggled to get to grips with this, but after explaining several times that the last chemo worked because he infused when I knew my meso was growing and if we did it again when the same process was happening we would get good results.  In fact he is still amazed at how well my mesothelioma responded.

 

So a mixed bag, but if I am in the Evidence Free Zone then surely this is the time to see what happens.  I honestly believe a better system would be if rare (I say that tongue in cheek) cancers  have a couple of specialists around the country then our own oncologists work under them for these types.  All info could be gathered in one place but we would never need to travel to another hospital for treatments.

 

Say if J Steele became chief Meso Onco - all evidence and patients file's were sent to him, maybe we all even consulted with him once.  Then when the standard treatment didn't work he had all other facts before him.  Hubby said this would add to his case load but lets think about it rationally, he sees nearly everyone after a certain point in treatment as we all end up going there asking his opinion at one time or another.

 

Then our own oncologists have someone else to fall back on when we become Zone Free.  Ever since 2009 I have been called this, no one else in the UK has undergone so many treatments as me (so I keep being told) and for my own advocacy I am still here today. 

 

Maybe I am one of the only people who know when my meso is taking a growth pattern, I don't know.  But surely others who have this cancer go through those Adrenalin rushes, temperature drops and pains that come for a few days then go again until 8 or 9 weeks later when they come back.  It may not be as long as my gaps, they could be monthly, but I do believe meso grows in starts and stops, it sprouts like a weed, sending its nasty seeds every so often out onto new clean tissue.

 

My MRI wasn't reported on but the Onco said it was better to stay off any physio until they were sure the meso wasn't involved.  He would chase the report up. funnily enough, well not funny really, my back is feeling much better, just need my leg to stop this White Noise pain.

 

So for me no real surprise as I knew the meso had movement, just wish it would have stayed off the pericardium.  I don't like those heavy heart pains one bit.

 

We are all still in shock over Debbie and as the community on face book mourns her passing it has reminded many of us we have no guarantee on how long we have.  We have to fight our battle as best we can and hope that we have the right doctors behind us to ensure we get the best chance possible.

 

To my fellow bloggers and mesothelioma patients keep well, keep focused on living, until the next time ......

Jan

 

 

Yesterday some 8 weeks after my scan I saw my oncologist.  I wish they would read what they say before seeing us again sometimes as I always feel like I am starting from square one in some areas.

 

Ok, the results are mixed, I have meso back around the pericardium, not the 7mm growth right around which the chemo knocked out, but it has regrown, so those slight heavy pains I have had recently tie in. Thank God though no fluid has collected their, although I have two lots of fluid areas in my chest now.

 

I have a couple of large tumours that have changed together with some new nodules and lymph nodes, while others have remained static.  My right lung has undergone changes, the mesothelioma in their has decided to grow again, although only slightly, but growing. 

 

Some of these growths would be ideal to have done with cryoablation because they are singular long tumours but it isn't a practise we have in this country so they will just keep growing.  I asked about the size of the thickening at the bottom of the lung but as he was going to measure it he found another lump so diverted the conversation, leaving me without an answer.

 

Treatment, well it was the 'you are in a Evidence Free Zone, no one has had your length of time with the treatments you have had.'  Together with having 'ATypical' mesothelioma.  He said that trying again with Alimta wasn't a good idea, at 50% I had a reaction and if he went any higher he would kill me.  I told him I thought it was the platins, but he then said because I have had Alimta 3 times it wouldn't make any difference as it hasn't held back the old stuff?  Confused - me too. 

 

I suggested trying Gemcitabine, as Mavis is trying this, he said he wasn't able to give this unless he had further backing.  He said last time he was going to discuss my case with J Steele so I reminded him.  He may get round to it over the next four months.

 

I then said I wouldn't be interested in treatment until at least September at the earliest, although I would hope it was September 14 not this year, unless I took a dramatic turn for the worst.  I said it would be better if they infused me again the time the mesothelioma was growing.  He struggled to get to grips with this, but after explaining several times that the last chemo worked because he infused when I knew my meso was growing and if we did it again when the same process was happening we would get good results.  In fact he is still amazed at how well my mesothelioma responded.

 

So a mixed bag, but if I am in the Evidence Free Zone then surely this is the time to see what happens.  I honestly believe a better system would be if rare (I say that tongue in cheek) cancers  have a couple of specialists around the country then our own oncologists work under them for these types.  All info could be gathered in one place but we would never need to travel to another hospital for treatments.

 

Say if J Steele became chief Meso Onco - all evidence and patients file's were sent to him, maybe we all even consulted with him once.  Then when the standard treatment didn't work he had all other facts before him.  Hubby said this would add to his case load but lets think about it rationally, he sees nearly everyone after a certain point in treatment as we all end up going there asking his opinion at one time or another.

 

Then our own oncologists have someone else to fall back on when we become Zone Free.  Ever since 2009 I have been called this, no one else in the UK has undergone so many treatments as me (so I keep being told) and for my own advocacy I am still here today. 

 

Maybe I am one of the only people who know when my meso is taking a growth pattern, I don't know.  But surely others who have this cancer go through those Adrenalin rushes, temperature drops and pains that come for a few days then go again until 8 or 9 weeks later when they come back.  It may not be as long as my gaps, they could be monthly, but I do believe meso grows in starts and stops, it sprouts like a weed, sending its nasty seeds every so often out onto new clean tissue.

 

My MRI wasn't reported on but the Onco said it was better to stay off any physio until they were sure the meso wasn't involved.  He would chase the report up. funnily enough, well not funny really, my back is feeling much better, just need my leg to stop this White Noise pain.

 

So for me no real surprise as I knew the meso had movement, just wish it would have stayed off the pericardium.  I don't like those heavy heart pains one bit.

 

We are all still in shock over Debbie and as the community on face book mourns her passing it has reminded many of us we have no guarantee on how long we have.  We have to fight our battle as best we can and hope that we have the right doctors behind us to ensure we get the best chance possible.

 

To my fellow bloggers and mesothelioma patients keep well, keep focused on living, until the next time ......

Jan

 

 

Yesterday some 8 weeks after my scan I saw my oncologist.  I wish they would read what they say before seeing us again sometimes as I always feel like I am starting from square one in some areas.

 

Ok, the results are mixed, I have meso back around the pericardium, not the 7mm growth right around which the chemo knocked out, but it has regrown, so those slight heavy pains I have had recently tie in. Thank God though no fluid has collected their, although I have two lots of fluid areas in my chest now.

 

I have a couple of large tumours that have changed together with some new nodules and lymph nodes, while others have remained static.  My right lung has undergone changes, the mesothelioma in their has decided to grow again, although only slightly, but growing. 

 

Some of these growths would be ideal to have done with cryoablation because they are singular long tumours but it isn't a practise we have in this country so they will just keep growing.  I asked about the size of the thickening at the bottom of the lung but as he was going to measure it he found another lump so diverted the conversation, leaving me without an answer.

 

Treatment, well it was the 'you are in a Evidence Free Zone, no one has had your length of time with the treatments you have had.'  Together with having 'ATypical' mesothelioma.  He said that trying again with Alimta wasn't a good idea, at 50% I had a reaction and if he went any higher he would kill me.  I told him I thought it was the platins, but he then said because I have had Alimta 3 times it wouldn't make any difference as it hasn't held back the old stuff?  Confused - me too. 

 

I suggested trying Gemcitabine, as Mavis is trying this, he said he wasn't able to give this unless he had further backing.  He said last time he was going to discuss my case with J Steele so I reminded him.  He may get round to it over the next four months.

 

I then said I wouldn't be interested in treatment until at least September at the earliest, although I would hope it was September 14 not this year, unless I took a dramatic turn for the worst.  I said it would be better if they infused me again the time the mesothelioma was growing.  He struggled to get to grips with this, but after explaining several times that the last chemo worked because he infused when I knew my meso was growing and if we did it again when the same process was happening we would get good results.  In fact he is still amazed at how well my mesothelioma responded.

 

So a mixed bag, but if I am in the Evidence Free Zone then surely this is the time to see what happens.  I honestly believe a better system would be if rare (I say that tongue in cheek) cancers  have a couple of specialists around the country then our own oncologists work under them for these types.  All info could be gathered in one place but we would never need to travel to another hospital for treatments.

 

Say if J Steele became chief Meso Onco - all evidence and patients file's were sent to him, maybe we all even consulted with him once.  Then when the standard treatment didn't work he had all other facts before him.  Hubby said this would add to his case load but lets think about it rationally, he sees nearly everyone after a certain point in treatment as we all end up going there asking his opinion at one time or another.

 

Then our own oncologists have someone else to fall back on when we become Zone Free.  Ever since 2009 I have been called this, no one else in the UK has undergone so many treatments as me (so I keep being told) and for my own advocacy I am still here today. 

 

Maybe I am one of the only people who know when my meso is taking a growth pattern, I don't know.  But surely others who have this cancer go through those Adrenalin rushes, temperature drops and pains that come for a few days then go again until 8 or 9 weeks later when they come back.  It may not be as long as my gaps, they could be monthly, but I do believe meso grows in starts and stops, it sprouts like a weed, sending its nasty seeds every so often out onto new clean tissue.

 

My MRI wasn't reported on but the Onco said it was better to stay off any physio until they were sure the meso wasn't involved.  He would chase the report up. funnily enough, well not funny really, my back is feeling much better, just need my leg to stop this White Noise pain.

 

So for me no real surprise as I knew the meso had movement, just wish it would have stayed off the pericardium.  I don't like those heavy heart pains one bit.

 

We are all still in shock over Debbie and as the community on face book mourns her passing it has reminded many of us we have no guarantee on how long we have.  We have to fight our battle as best we can and hope that we have the right doctors behind us to ensure we get the best chance possible.

 

To my fellow bloggers and mesothelioma patients keep well, keep focused on living, until the next time ......

Jan

 

 

mesothelioma-For Debbie - JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-For Debbie - JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-For Debbie - JUSTICEWORLD

I woke early this morning and instead of my normal routine I went straight onto facebook, my cyber friend and Meso Warrior, Mavis messaged me within a few minutes to give me the shocking news that Debbie, our well known Meso Warrior from Plymouth had past away during the night.

 

Debbie was one of the first to use facebook as a way to bring together all those with mesothelioma and build support pages as well as awareness.  She knew that many found the health sites too hard to read and wanted a community for people to be able to air their thoughts or ask those difficult questions as well as supporting each other through their own individual journeys.

 

She has touched many thousands throughout the world, her courage at trying a new treatment in Germany brought her name to the attention of the press and news coverage.  She woke the South of England up to the fact that Asbestos was a dangerous substance and that many people would keep dying from it.

 

She was loved in the USA and honoured by ADAO in 2012.  Recently she accepted the role of Ambassador for the Mick Knighton Mesothelioma Research Fund.

 

Debbie was due to commence another line of chemotherapy but she had been suffering from a chest infection which started earlier this year.  Unable to take certain antibiotics the infection didn't clear properly, leading to her having to be admitted to a hospice to help control the pain she was suffering due to both the growth and the infection.

 

I am sure many of you will be as shocked and upset at this news as I am, but I am thankful I knew her and her courageous spirit at fighting mesothelioma and finding the time to be their for others was remarkable.

 

We salute you Debbie Muvmuv Brewer, Rest In Peace

 

 

 

I woke early this morning and instead of my normal routine I went straight onto facebook, my cyber friend and Meso Warrior, Mavis messaged me within a few minutes to give me the shocking news that Debbie, our well known Meso Warrior from Plymouth had past away during the night.

 

Debbie was one of the first to use facebook as a way to bring together all those with mesothelioma and build support pages as well as awareness.  She knew that many found the health sites too hard to read and wanted a community for people to be able to air their thoughts or ask those difficult questions as well as supporting each other through their own individual journeys.

 

She has touched many thousands throughout the world, her courage at trying a new treatment in Germany brought her name to the attention of the press and news coverage.  She woke the South of England up to the fact that Asbestos was a dangerous substance and that many people would keep dying from it.

 

She was loved in the USA and honoured by ADAO in 2012.  Recently she accepted the role of Ambassador for the Mick Knighton Mesothelioma Research Fund.

 

Debbie was due to commence another line of chemotherapy but she had been suffering from a chest infection which started earlier this year.  Unable to take certain antibiotics the infection didn't clear properly, leading to her having to be admitted to a hospice to help control the pain she was suffering due to both the growth and the infection.

 

I am sure many of you will be as shocked and upset at this news as I am, but I am thankful I knew her and her courageous spirit at fighting mesothelioma and finding the time to be their for others was remarkable.

 

We salute you Debbie Muvmuv Brewer, Rest In Peace

 

 

 

I woke early this morning and instead of my normal routine I went straight onto facebook, my cyber friend and Meso Warrior, Mavis messaged me within a few minutes to give me the shocking news that Debbie, our well known Meso Warrior from Plymouth had past away during the night.

 

Debbie was one of the first to use facebook as a way to bring together all those with mesothelioma and build support pages as well as awareness.  She knew that many found the health sites too hard to read and wanted a community for people to be able to air their thoughts or ask those difficult questions as well as supporting each other through their own individual journeys.

 

She has touched many thousands throughout the world, her courage at trying a new treatment in Germany brought her name to the attention of the press and news coverage.  She woke the South of England up to the fact that Asbestos was a dangerous substance and that many people would keep dying from it.

 

She was loved in the USA and honoured by ADAO in 2012.  Recently she accepted the role of Ambassador for the Mick Knighton Mesothelioma Research Fund.

 

Debbie was due to commence another line of chemotherapy but she had been suffering from a chest infection which started earlier this year.  Unable to take certain antibiotics the infection didn't clear properly, leading to her having to be admitted to a hospice to help control the pain she was suffering due to both the growth and the infection.

 

I am sure many of you will be as shocked and upset at this news as I am, but I am thankful I knew her and her courageous spirit at fighting mesothelioma and finding the time to be their for others was remarkable.

 

We salute you Debbie Muvmuv Brewer, Rest In Peace

 

 

 

mesothelioma-MRI Jitters- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-MRI Jitters- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-MRI Jitters- JUSTICEWORLD

It isn't often I get the jitters about going for scans etc, but it was an MRI scan that showed up my original mesothelioma, not that they knew it was that then.  Just my chest lit up like Blackpool illuminations with white spots everywhere.  But it was still another year and some before anyone really looked at it.  I guess because I had it done privately no one thought of checking it further than to see if I had fluid, which I did.  The scan was never looked at again until the surgeon had a peep and knew something was in there.  But hey that was some 10 years ago and this one is different right?  This one is to see why my back etc is causing so much trouble.

 

I came home from work crippled again yesterday, only sitting in my chair for 30 minutes at a time, I don't know whether its the position or not.  Having just got up I have been flat all night and my back seems a little better, hope it stays that way today.

 

I did go and lie in the sun, although I spent most of the time asleep, the additional morphine is making me tired, so last night I knocked the additional 30 on the head and will try a extra nerve tablet today.

 

Bear was a tinker yesterday and stole my tea, he was eyeing it cup up for ages on the little table so I had to give in.

I don't know about everyone else but the swallows around our garden have been flocking in dozens but they are so hard to actually catch on film as they don't stay still for long.  Hubby had his camera out all day and finally managed to snap one just before it took flight again.

Such beautiful colours you would never think they had blue wings when you see them darting here and there.

 

Mavis has being asked to round us all up and fill out this questionnaire on behalf of BLF for patients and carers alike to say what kind of treatment they would like to see.  It is short but please fill it in.

http://www.blf.org.uk/News/Detail/New-national-lung-cancer-survey-launched

 

I am so happy to read that my fellow bloggers are all doing well at the moment, Steve has been given the "Stable" news, Tess has gone for no 5, therefore must be having good results, Mavis is holding her own on the new treatment, Debbie is improving day by day.  I haven't heard from Amanda for a week or so, so I am hoping her and Ray are doing well.  One of the sad stories throughout face book is that of Janelle Bedel, her journey is coming to the closing chapters. 

 

It is heartbreaking when a person so young is diagnosed with this cancer, it is heartbreaking when anyone is, but especially more so when its a young mam.  Janelle has earned the title of Wonder Woman, I just wish a treatment to prevent death was here and available now. 

 

Excited to say the sun is out again, I hope for everyone else it brings the best out in you and you have a wonderful day.

I have also posted an article for mesotheliomahelp.net which you can find here:
http://www.mesotheliomahelp.net/blog/2013/06/mesothelioma-survivor-weighs-in-on-being-her-own-advocate

It isn't often I get the jitters about going for scans etc, but it was an MRI scan that showed up my original mesothelioma, not that they knew it was that then.  Just my chest lit up like Blackpool illuminations with white spots everywhere.  But it was still another year and some before anyone really looked at it.  I guess because I had it done privately no one thought of checking it further than to see if I had fluid, which I did.  The scan was never looked at again until the surgeon had a peep and knew something was in there.  But hey that was some 10 years ago and this one is different right?  This one is to see why my back etc is causing so much trouble.

 

I came home from work crippled again yesterday, only sitting in my chair for 30 minutes at a time, I don't know whether its the position or not.  Having just got up I have been flat all night and my back seems a little better, hope it stays that way today.

 

I did go and lie in the sun, although I spent most of the time asleep, the additional morphine is making me tired, so last night I knocked the additional 30 on the head and will try a extra nerve tablet today.

 

Bear was a tinker yesterday and stole my tea, he was eyeing it cup up for ages on the little table so I had to give in.

I don't know about everyone else but the swallows around our garden have been flocking in dozens but they are so hard to actually catch on film as they don't stay still for long.  Hubby had his camera out all day and finally managed to snap one just before it took flight again.

Such beautiful colours you would never think they had blue wings when you see them darting here and there.

 

Mavis has being asked to round us all up and fill out this questionnaire on behalf of BLF for patients and carers alike to say what kind of treatment they would like to see.  It is short but please fill it in.

http://www.blf.org.uk/News/Detail/New-national-lung-cancer-survey-launched

 

I am so happy to read that my fellow bloggers are all doing well at the moment, Steve has been given the "Stable" news, Tess has gone for no 5, therefore must be having good results, Mavis is holding her own on the new treatment, Debbie is improving day by day.  I haven't heard from Amanda for a week or so, so I am hoping her and Ray are doing well.  One of the sad stories throughout face book is that of Janelle Bedel, her journey is coming to the closing chapters. 

 

It is heartbreaking when a person so young is diagnosed with this cancer, it is heartbreaking when anyone is, but especially more so when its a young mam.  Janelle has earned the title of Wonder Woman, I just wish a treatment to prevent death was here and available now. 

 

Excited to say the sun is out again, I hope for everyone else it brings the best out in you and you have a wonderful day.

I have also posted an article for mesotheliomahelp.net which you can find here:
http://www.mesotheliomahelp.net/blog/2013/06/mesothelioma-survivor-weighs-in-on-being-her-own-advocate

It isn't often I get the jitters about going for scans etc, but it was an MRI scan that showed up my original mesothelioma, not that they knew it was that then.  Just my chest lit up like Blackpool illuminations with white spots everywhere.  But it was still another year and some before anyone really looked at it.  I guess because I had it done privately no one thought of checking it further than to see if I had fluid, which I did.  The scan was never looked at again until the surgeon had a peep and knew something was in there.  But hey that was some 10 years ago and this one is different right?  This one is to see why my back etc is causing so much trouble.

 

I came home from work crippled again yesterday, only sitting in my chair for 30 minutes at a time, I don't know whether its the position or not.  Having just got up I have been flat all night and my back seems a little better, hope it stays that way today.

 

I did go and lie in the sun, although I spent most of the time asleep, the additional morphine is making me tired, so last night I knocked the additional 30 on the head and will try a extra nerve tablet today.

 

Bear was a tinker yesterday and stole my tea, he was eyeing it cup up for ages on the little table so I had to give in.

I don't know about everyone else but the swallows around our garden have been flocking in dozens but they are so hard to actually catch on film as they don't stay still for long.  Hubby had his camera out all day and finally managed to snap one just before it took flight again.

Such beautiful colours you would never think they had blue wings when you see them darting here and there.

 

Mavis has being asked to round us all up and fill out this questionnaire on behalf of BLF for patients and carers alike to say what kind of treatment they would like to see.  It is short but please fill it in.

http://www.blf.org.uk/News/Detail/New-national-lung-cancer-survey-launched

 

I am so happy to read that my fellow bloggers are all doing well at the moment, Steve has been given the "Stable" news, Tess has gone for no 5, therefore must be having good results, Mavis is holding her own on the new treatment, Debbie is improving day by day.  I haven't heard from Amanda for a week or so, so I am hoping her and Ray are doing well.  One of the sad stories throughout face book is that of Janelle Bedel, her journey is coming to the closing chapters. 

 

It is heartbreaking when a person so young is diagnosed with this cancer, it is heartbreaking when anyone is, but especially more so when its a young mam.  Janelle has earned the title of Wonder Woman, I just wish a treatment to prevent death was here and available now. 

 

Excited to say the sun is out again, I hope for everyone else it brings the best out in you and you have a wonderful day.

I have also posted an article for mesotheliomahelp.net which you can find here:
http://www.mesotheliomahelp.net/blog/2013/06/mesothelioma-survivor-weighs-in-on-being-her-own-advocate

mesothelioma-Beautiful Days Ahead- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Beautiful Days Ahead- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Beautiful Days Ahead- JUSTICEWORLD

Hubby read the forecast out for the week, sun, sun and more sun!  The sky was a perfect blue at 6am this morning but I turned over and went back to sleep.  My back felt easier so I thought I would make the most of it.

We took Lexi and Bear over the fields, although only a short walk today as Lexi has to take it easy.  I am still giving her pain relief for her operations, poor thing but I must admit although she has stitches in her bum she is sitting better and I think amazed herself when she actually sat properly instead of having to tuck her leg underneath and flop down.  Removing that pile will make life so much more comfortable for her, sometimes the smallest things can make life so miserable.

 

We came home and sat in the garden, one minute top on the next off.  The clouds were heavy when they came but still it was lovely.  Late afternoon was a lot warmer and Bear decided he wanted to get involved watering the plants.  I loaded him chasing the hosepipe on youtube, wow I didn't know I could do that until I pressed a button and up it went.

http://youtu.be/V5D-flMs2r0

The little devil decided to rush between my legs when he was soaking wet, then Lexi took up the game.  My inside thighs were soaking so off I went and got changed again.  I am so pleased he didn't try to do this Friday or Saturday, I am sure dogs know when things are wrong.  Just wish we could read them as well as they read us.

 

Today I feel great, although I was stiff when I got up from sitting, a few spasms shot down my leg but nothing compared to where I was. 

I just hope when I finally see my onco a week tomorrow now, he will be able to put my mind at rest and tell me it isn't the mesothelioma pushing on any nerves. 

 

I am pleased to report that Debbie is back on the road to recovery with her chest infection and it seems Mavis is doing very well on her 4th line chemo.  They have used Gemcitabine or Gemzar as named in other countries.  This was on trial back in 2007/8 for kidney cancer with good results so hopefully may become another good one for mesothelioma.  From what Mavis has reported pains have ceased, always a good sign as that means the meso has been hit.  I haven't heard from Chris since he finished his 4th line, although he was given a totally different treatment, the 3 in 1 which is sort of on trial but not.  It's hard to believe that Chris and I were both operated on in August 04 on the same day by the same surgeon and both had mesothelioma.  In fact that week there were 4 of us, one gentleman lasted 6 months and I think the other a couple of years.  Chris had suffered with symptoms for 6 months, he even told his doctor he had worked with asbestos but had to wait for months before they checked him for mesothelioma.  I know old history but I guess Chris and I are lucky as we are both still here. 

 

I guess I should go to work next week, only 4 more then we are away, just hope my leg\back etc has greatly improved and I don't have days like Friday when away.

 

A meso friend has been away too and agrees with me, warmth and sun on our bones makes our meso pains fall into the background.  So nature if you are listening, please give us the summer we so desperately need.

 

I hope to all the meso warriors around the world are winning and keeping our man made enemy at bay, to those currently on treatment hold onto the fact it will work.  The sun makes life seem so much more brighter.

Hubby read the forecast out for the week, sun, sun and more sun!  The sky was a perfect blue at 6am this morning but I turned over and went back to sleep.  My back felt easier so I thought I would make the most of it.

We took Lexi and Bear over the fields, although only a short walk today as Lexi has to take it easy.  I am still giving her pain relief for her operations, poor thing but I must admit although she has stitches in her bum she is sitting better and I think amazed herself when she actually sat properly instead of having to tuck her leg underneath and flop down.  Removing that pile will make life so much more comfortable for her, sometimes the smallest things can make life so miserable.

 

We came home and sat in the garden, one minute top on the next off.  The clouds were heavy when they came but still it was lovely.  Late afternoon was a lot warmer and Bear decided he wanted to get involved watering the plants.  I loaded him chasing the hosepipe on youtube, wow I didn't know I could do that until I pressed a button and up it went.

http://youtu.be/V5D-flMs2r0

The little devil decided to rush between my legs when he was soaking wet, then Lexi took up the game.  My inside thighs were soaking so off I went and got changed again.  I am so pleased he didn't try to do this Friday or Saturday, I am sure dogs know when things are wrong.  Just wish we could read them as well as they read us.

 

Today I feel great, although I was stiff when I got up from sitting, a few spasms shot down my leg but nothing compared to where I was. 

I just hope when I finally see my onco a week tomorrow now, he will be able to put my mind at rest and tell me it isn't the mesothelioma pushing on any nerves. 

 

I am pleased to report that Debbie is back on the road to recovery with her chest infection and it seems Mavis is doing very well on her 4th line chemo.  They have used Gemcitabine or Gemzar as named in other countries.  This was on trial back in 2007/8 for kidney cancer with good results so hopefully may become another good one for mesothelioma.  From what Mavis has reported pains have ceased, always a good sign as that means the meso has been hit.  I haven't heard from Chris since he finished his 4th line, although he was given a totally different treatment, the 3 in 1 which is sort of on trial but not.  It's hard to believe that Chris and I were both operated on in August 04 on the same day by the same surgeon and both had mesothelioma.  In fact that week there were 4 of us, one gentleman lasted 6 months and I think the other a couple of years.  Chris had suffered with symptoms for 6 months, he even told his doctor he had worked with asbestos but had to wait for months before they checked him for mesothelioma.  I know old history but I guess Chris and I are lucky as we are both still here. 

 

I guess I should go to work next week, only 4 more then we are away, just hope my leg\back etc has greatly improved and I don't have days like Friday when away.

 

A meso friend has been away too and agrees with me, warmth and sun on our bones makes our meso pains fall into the background.  So nature if you are listening, please give us the summer we so desperately need.

 

I hope to all the meso warriors around the world are winning and keeping our man made enemy at bay, to those currently on treatment hold onto the fact it will work.  The sun makes life seem so much more brighter.

Hubby read the forecast out for the week, sun, sun and more sun!  The sky was a perfect blue at 6am this morning but I turned over and went back to sleep.  My back felt easier so I thought I would make the most of it.

We took Lexi and Bear over the fields, although only a short walk today as Lexi has to take it easy.  I am still giving her pain relief for her operations, poor thing but I must admit although she has stitches in her bum she is sitting better and I think amazed herself when she actually sat properly instead of having to tuck her leg underneath and flop down.  Removing that pile will make life so much more comfortable for her, sometimes the smallest things can make life so miserable.

 

We came home and sat in the garden, one minute top on the next off.  The clouds were heavy when they came but still it was lovely.  Late afternoon was a lot warmer and Bear decided he wanted to get involved watering the plants.  I loaded him chasing the hosepipe on youtube, wow I didn't know I could do that until I pressed a button and up it went.

http://youtu.be/V5D-flMs2r0

The little devil decided to rush between my legs when he was soaking wet, then Lexi took up the game.  My inside thighs were soaking so off I went and got changed again.  I am so pleased he didn't try to do this Friday or Saturday, I am sure dogs know when things are wrong.  Just wish we could read them as well as they read us.

 

Today I feel great, although I was stiff when I got up from sitting, a few spasms shot down my leg but nothing compared to where I was. 

I just hope when I finally see my onco a week tomorrow now, he will be able to put my mind at rest and tell me it isn't the mesothelioma pushing on any nerves. 

 

I am pleased to report that Debbie is back on the road to recovery with her chest infection and it seems Mavis is doing very well on her 4th line chemo.  They have used Gemcitabine or Gemzar as named in other countries.  This was on trial back in 2007/8 for kidney cancer with good results so hopefully may become another good one for mesothelioma.  From what Mavis has reported pains have ceased, always a good sign as that means the meso has been hit.  I haven't heard from Chris since he finished his 4th line, although he was given a totally different treatment, the 3 in 1 which is sort of on trial but not.  It's hard to believe that Chris and I were both operated on in August 04 on the same day by the same surgeon and both had mesothelioma.  In fact that week there were 4 of us, one gentleman lasted 6 months and I think the other a couple of years.  Chris had suffered with symptoms for 6 months, he even told his doctor he had worked with asbestos but had to wait for months before they checked him for mesothelioma.  I know old history but I guess Chris and I are lucky as we are both still here. 

 

I guess I should go to work next week, only 4 more then we are away, just hope my leg\back etc has greatly improved and I don't have days like Friday when away.

 

A meso friend has been away too and agrees with me, warmth and sun on our bones makes our meso pains fall into the background.  So nature if you are listening, please give us the summer we so desperately need.

 

I hope to all the meso warriors around the world are winning and keeping our man made enemy at bay, to those currently on treatment hold onto the fact it will work.  The sun makes life seem so much more brighter.

mesothelioma-Another Day of Back Manipulation- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Another Day of Back Manipulation- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Another Day of Back Manipulation- JUSTICEWORLD

What a week we are having from hot weather to brutally cold days then muggy nights.

 

Today was my visit by to the physiotherapist, I asked him to be gentle with me as it seems this nerve problem is doing all kinds of weird and unwonderful things.  Who could believe that even passing water could become so painful, no stinging but a dull pain in the muscles.

 

He reiterated that the damage will take months to correct and that the brain is trying to deal with the different signals, hence the pain travels to different places.  Please I begged, I just want to be normal!  To think this all started with some strange spasm in my left leg when I lifted it a certain height or went to sit or cross or my legs.

 

Ever since surgery I have stayed away from massages on my back, allowing only along my shoulders even though I would love a great back rub.  Now I wonder if I had allowed a back massage would I be having all this trouble now?  Although by the time he has pressed on my poor left side, where all my thickening resides I wonder if I am doing more damage than good.

 

We take so much for granted, I just seem to go from one pain event to another, maybe if I turn my thoughts around and say give me more pain it might just disappear!  Now that would be nice.

 

Many meso warriors around the world are facing rounds of chemotherapy or trials for new drugs, it is frightening now to think how many people actually have this terrible cancer and yet we are no further forward than we were 8 years ago with a different chemotherapy treatment.  If asbestos is a natural fibre then somewhere near its mining area most be something that can destroy it.  I wish there was a dog leaf we could eat that killed the tumours that develop in our bodies.

 

I am also still upset at the fact I am still waiting for my results, by the time I get them it will be 2 months to the next scan, (if that is actually done on time) not much time for celebrating all is ok, then today I received another letter with a different appointment date for my oncologist.  I'm not sure whether the one in early June has been cancelled and the one end of June is now replacing it which will make it nearly 9 weeks after the scan.  Another job tomorrow to ring and see what is going on.

 

Lexi came through her surgery, thankfully.  Although we were worried as when we rang at 1 pm she was still under her blanket and not moving much.  They found two tumours and removed both together with a small lump removed from her rear right ankle and one from the top of her left rear paw.  Then they looked at her pile and removed that, only to end up having to stitch inside her anus as the pile was much deeper than anticipated.  The poor dog is not a happy girl, she looks at hubby adoringly and gives me daggers.  Maybe because I'm the one that gives her the nasty tasting meds!

 

That's it from here, hope we all live to fight another year, we are driven by the will to live and long may that continue.

What a week we are having from hot weather to brutally cold days then muggy nights.

 

Today was my visit by to the physiotherapist, I asked him to be gentle with me as it seems this nerve problem is doing all kinds of weird and unwonderful things.  Who could believe that even passing water could become so painful, no stinging but a dull pain in the muscles.

 

He reiterated that the damage will take months to correct and that the brain is trying to deal with the different signals, hence the pain travels to different places.  Please I begged, I just want to be normal!  To think this all started with some strange spasm in my left leg when I lifted it a certain height or went to sit or cross or my legs.

 

Ever since surgery I have stayed away from massages on my back, allowing only along my shoulders even though I would love a great back rub.  Now I wonder if I had allowed a back massage would I be having all this trouble now?  Although by the time he has pressed on my poor left side, where all my thickening resides I wonder if I am doing more damage than good.

 

We take so much for granted, I just seem to go from one pain event to another, maybe if I turn my thoughts around and say give me more pain it might just disappear!  Now that would be nice.

 

Many meso warriors around the world are facing rounds of chemotherapy or trials for new drugs, it is frightening now to think how many people actually have this terrible cancer and yet we are no further forward than we were 8 years ago with a different chemotherapy treatment.  If asbestos is a natural fibre then somewhere near its mining area most be something that can destroy it.  I wish there was a dog leaf we could eat that killed the tumours that develop in our bodies.

 

I am also still upset at the fact I am still waiting for my results, by the time I get them it will be 2 months to the next scan, (if that is actually done on time) not much time for celebrating all is ok, then today I received another letter with a different appointment date for my oncologist.  I'm not sure whether the one in early June has been cancelled and the one end of June is now replacing it which will make it nearly 9 weeks after the scan.  Another job tomorrow to ring and see what is going on.

 

Lexi came through her surgery, thankfully.  Although we were worried as when we rang at 1 pm she was still under her blanket and not moving much.  They found two tumours and removed both together with a small lump removed from her rear right ankle and one from the top of her left rear paw.  Then they looked at her pile and removed that, only to end up having to stitch inside her anus as the pile was much deeper than anticipated.  The poor dog is not a happy girl, she looks at hubby adoringly and gives me daggers.  Maybe because I'm the one that gives her the nasty tasting meds!

 

That's it from here, hope we all live to fight another year, we are driven by the will to live and long may that continue.

What a week we are having from hot weather to brutally cold days then muggy nights.

 

Today was my visit by to the physiotherapist, I asked him to be gentle with me as it seems this nerve problem is doing all kinds of weird and unwonderful things.  Who could believe that even passing water could become so painful, no stinging but a dull pain in the muscles.

 

He reiterated that the damage will take months to correct and that the brain is trying to deal with the different signals, hence the pain travels to different places.  Please I begged, I just want to be normal!  To think this all started with some strange spasm in my left leg when I lifted it a certain height or went to sit or cross or my legs.

 

Ever since surgery I have stayed away from massages on my back, allowing only along my shoulders even though I would love a great back rub.  Now I wonder if I had allowed a back massage would I be having all this trouble now?  Although by the time he has pressed on my poor left side, where all my thickening resides I wonder if I am doing more damage than good.

 

We take so much for granted, I just seem to go from one pain event to another, maybe if I turn my thoughts around and say give me more pain it might just disappear!  Now that would be nice.

 

Many meso warriors around the world are facing rounds of chemotherapy or trials for new drugs, it is frightening now to think how many people actually have this terrible cancer and yet we are no further forward than we were 8 years ago with a different chemotherapy treatment.  If asbestos is a natural fibre then somewhere near its mining area most be something that can destroy it.  I wish there was a dog leaf we could eat that killed the tumours that develop in our bodies.

 

I am also still upset at the fact I am still waiting for my results, by the time I get them it will be 2 months to the next scan, (if that is actually done on time) not much time for celebrating all is ok, then today I received another letter with a different appointment date for my oncologist.  I'm not sure whether the one in early June has been cancelled and the one end of June is now replacing it which will make it nearly 9 weeks after the scan.  Another job tomorrow to ring and see what is going on.

 

Lexi came through her surgery, thankfully.  Although we were worried as when we rang at 1 pm she was still under her blanket and not moving much.  They found two tumours and removed both together with a small lump removed from her rear right ankle and one from the top of her left rear paw.  Then they looked at her pile and removed that, only to end up having to stitch inside her anus as the pile was much deeper than anticipated.  The poor dog is not a happy girl, she looks at hubby adoringly and gives me daggers.  Maybe because I'm the one that gives her the nasty tasting meds!

 

That's it from here, hope we all live to fight another year, we are driven by the will to live and long may that continue.

mesothelioma-Heat and Blue Skies- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Heat and Blue Skies- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Heat and Blue Skies- JUSTICEWORLD

Yesterday morning we woke to sunshine flooding the bedroom, although outside was still a little cool, but Yes I thought, Sunshine.

 

I had overslept so my body ached badly, especially my back and leg, together with my normal torso feeling of the body being compacted.  But a couple of coffee's later and of course checking what is happening in the world I was ready to face the day.

 

Hubby was sat outside, he came in with the papers but a look on his face that told me something was wrong, Lexi has another growth.  We both had a quick shower then straight to the vets, yes it will probably be cancerous, the last one was.  The only worry is it could have spread to her lungs, she is panting a lot but then she is nearly 12 but nevertheless the lump will be removed.  We had also found a small nodule on the back of her foot, we didn't think this serious but our vet told us these were things that caused dogs to lose a leg.  He will take a biopsy of this one too.  One bit of good news the pile that is giving her grief may be able to be removed, so at least she will get some benefit from the operation.

 

We came home and took them both over the woods, the sun was warmish, not too hot for Lexi.  Both her and I are like little old women, in the case of Lexi I guess she is.  We both took the walk slowly around the field and through the woods.  The grass is really growing now but was quite wet, the ponds still flooded so heavy boots required to keep my toes dry. 

We headed home for lunch then an afternoon in the garden, hubby cutting he lawn, me proof reading The Vial.  This is the time I wish I had an editor or agent, as I have two other books I have started, one another in the series of Bear Boy and another about my own journey through life and meso.  Not sure whether I would publish the latter though.

As we sat in the heat of the afternoon sun we had an ice pop each, Bear sat in front of me the entire time so I had to share.

I love Ice Lollies!

But cold on his stomach isn't a good mixture, so after eating half my ice pop he consequently threw up, thankfully not over me.

Hubby brought out some crisps, again he begged, drooling like it was going out of fashion for a Newfoundland.  My clean clothes are in the wash!

More Please!

If he could have put his nose in the bag he would have done.

Well it looks like nice weather again today.  Why is it though when its hot I feel like I should be doing house work or sorting drawers out, I think when I was living at home sunny days always made for more housework or a good clean out.

 

I was supposed to be in the Sunday Sun today regarding the release of The DreamWeaver's Choice and why the Tissue bank is so important and of course MKMRF.  I have done two interviews for this paper previously.  As the paper man hasn't been as yet I don't know whether it has been included.

 

Well that's all from the Sunny North East of England, no doubt we will be a couple of degrees cooler than those down South but at least for once we have some sun!

Yesterday morning we woke to sunshine flooding the bedroom, although outside was still a little cool, but Yes I thought, Sunshine.

 

I had overslept so my body ached badly, especially my back and leg, together with my normal torso feeling of the body being compacted.  But a couple of coffee's later and of course checking what is happening in the world I was ready to face the day.

 

Hubby was sat outside, he came in with the papers but a look on his face that told me something was wrong, Lexi has another growth.  We both had a quick shower then straight to the vets, yes it will probably be cancerous, the last one was.  The only worry is it could have spread to her lungs, she is panting a lot but then she is nearly 12 but nevertheless the lump will be removed.  We had also found a small nodule on the back of her foot, we didn't think this serious but our vet told us these were things that caused dogs to lose a leg.  He will take a biopsy of this one too.  One bit of good news the pile that is giving her grief may be able to be removed, so at least she will get some benefit from the operation.

 

We came home and took them both over the woods, the sun was warmish, not too hot for Lexi.  Both her and I are like little old women, in the case of Lexi I guess she is.  We both took the walk slowly around the field and through the woods.  The grass is really growing now but was quite wet, the ponds still flooded so heavy boots required to keep my toes dry. 

We headed home for lunch then an afternoon in the garden, hubby cutting he lawn, me proof reading The Vial.  This is the time I wish I had an editor or agent, as I have two other books I have started, one another in the series of Bear Boy and another about my own journey through life and meso.  Not sure whether I would publish the latter though.

As we sat in the heat of the afternoon sun we had an ice pop each, Bear sat in front of me the entire time so I had to share.

I love Ice Lollies!

But cold on his stomach isn't a good mixture, so after eating half my ice pop he consequently threw up, thankfully not over me.

Hubby brought out some crisps, again he begged, drooling like it was going out of fashion for a Newfoundland.  My clean clothes are in the wash!

More Please!

If he could have put his nose in the bag he would have done.

Well it looks like nice weather again today.  Why is it though when its hot I feel like I should be doing house work or sorting drawers out, I think when I was living at home sunny days always made for more housework or a good clean out.

 

I was supposed to be in the Sunday Sun today regarding the release of The DreamWeaver's Choice and why the Tissue bank is so important and of course MKMRF.  I have done two interviews for this paper previously.  As the paper man hasn't been as yet I don't know whether it has been included.

 

Well that's all from the Sunny North East of England, no doubt we will be a couple of degrees cooler than those down South but at least for once we have some sun!

Yesterday morning we woke to sunshine flooding the bedroom, although outside was still a little cool, but Yes I thought, Sunshine.

 

I had overslept so my body ached badly, especially my back and leg, together with my normal torso feeling of the body being compacted.  But a couple of coffee's later and of course checking what is happening in the world I was ready to face the day.

 

Hubby was sat outside, he came in with the papers but a look on his face that told me something was wrong, Lexi has another growth.  We both had a quick shower then straight to the vets, yes it will probably be cancerous, the last one was.  The only worry is it could have spread to her lungs, she is panting a lot but then she is nearly 12 but nevertheless the lump will be removed.  We had also found a small nodule on the back of her foot, we didn't think this serious but our vet told us these were things that caused dogs to lose a leg.  He will take a biopsy of this one too.  One bit of good news the pile that is giving her grief may be able to be removed, so at least she will get some benefit from the operation.

 

We came home and took them both over the woods, the sun was warmish, not too hot for Lexi.  Both her and I are like little old women, in the case of Lexi I guess she is.  We both took the walk slowly around the field and through the woods.  The grass is really growing now but was quite wet, the ponds still flooded so heavy boots required to keep my toes dry. 

We headed home for lunch then an afternoon in the garden, hubby cutting he lawn, me proof reading The Vial.  This is the time I wish I had an editor or agent, as I have two other books I have started, one another in the series of Bear Boy and another about my own journey through life and meso.  Not sure whether I would publish the latter though.

As we sat in the heat of the afternoon sun we had an ice pop each, Bear sat in front of me the entire time so I had to share.

I love Ice Lollies!

But cold on his stomach isn't a good mixture, so after eating half my ice pop he consequently threw up, thankfully not over me.

Hubby brought out some crisps, again he begged, drooling like it was going out of fashion for a Newfoundland.  My clean clothes are in the wash!

More Please!

If he could have put his nose in the bag he would have done.

Well it looks like nice weather again today.  Why is it though when its hot I feel like I should be doing house work or sorting drawers out, I think when I was living at home sunny days always made for more housework or a good clean out.

 

I was supposed to be in the Sunday Sun today regarding the release of The DreamWeaver's Choice and why the Tissue bank is so important and of course MKMRF.  I have done two interviews for this paper previously.  As the paper man hasn't been as yet I don't know whether it has been included.

 

Well that's all from the Sunny North East of England, no doubt we will be a couple of degrees cooler than those down South but at least for once we have some sun!

mesothelioma-Poor hubby- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Poor hubby- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Poor hubby- JUSTICEWORLD

Having a rotten time with my leg\back\heal\shoulders and head I feel so bad for hubby, he started with a raging sore throat over the weekend finally going to the doctors on Tuesday to get a strong dose of antibiotics.

 

He looks so sad, unable to swallow and drink, but why is it men seem to look more sad and unable to do things than us women.  I hate the fact he has had to run after me while I couldn't walk but I don't think my demure (for want of a better word) was as sad or is as sad as his.

 

Men are certainly wired differently to us, hence why men deal with mesothelioma so differently than the growing number of women who have it.

 

I have managed to go to work this week, although yesterday I could have stayed home.  I went to the physio on Monday and I swear what the one on Thursday put right she has put wrong again, I just want this whole problem to go away but it does seem two steps forward and one step back. 

 

One good thing about hubby being ill he won't move from in front of the TV so he waited patiently for the article on Mesothelioma being discussed in the House of Commons, after some two hours it was brought up for less than 3 seconds, only to be passed to the House of Lords.  Well I am pleased he watched it and not I!

 

It seems the government are looking to put compensation in place for those who haven't an company they can seek compensation from.  I was hoping the debate was going to be on spending more money for much needed research.

 

I have heard from a gentleman in Germany who is looking at the following treatment for a family member,  although another USA product it seems like the trials will go international.

http://www.asbestos.com/news/2013/01/25/verastem-inc-to-begin-developing-novel-mesothelioma-drug/

I am not sure whether this is something that is being developed in Wales under a different pharmaceutical company.

 

Guess that's all from me today, another day in the office but my do I wish I could put my feet up.  At least I can walk again.

 

Having a rotten time with my leg\back\heal\shoulders and head I feel so bad for hubby, he started with a raging sore throat over the weekend finally going to the doctors on Tuesday to get a strong dose of antibiotics.

 

He looks so sad, unable to swallow and drink, but why is it men seem to look more sad and unable to do things than us women.  I hate the fact he has had to run after me while I couldn't walk but I don't think my demure (for want of a better word) was as sad or is as sad as his.

 

Men are certainly wired differently to us, hence why men deal with mesothelioma so differently than the growing number of women who have it.

 

I have managed to go to work this week, although yesterday I could have stayed home.  I went to the physio on Monday and I swear what the one on Thursday put right she has put wrong again, I just want this whole problem to go away but it does seem two steps forward and one step back. 

 

One good thing about hubby being ill he won't move from in front of the TV so he waited patiently for the article on Mesothelioma being discussed in the House of Commons, after some two hours it was brought up for less than 3 seconds, only to be passed to the House of Lords.  Well I am pleased he watched it and not I!

 

It seems the government are looking to put compensation in place for those who haven't an company they can seek compensation from.  I was hoping the debate was going to be on spending more money for much needed research.

 

I have heard from a gentleman in Germany who is looking at the following treatment for a family member,  although another USA product it seems like the trials will go international.

http://www.asbestos.com/news/2013/01/25/verastem-inc-to-begin-developing-novel-mesothelioma-drug/

I am not sure whether this is something that is being developed in Wales under a different pharmaceutical company.

 

Guess that's all from me today, another day in the office but my do I wish I could put my feet up.  At least I can walk again.

 

Having a rotten time with my leg\back\heal\shoulders and head I feel so bad for hubby, he started with a raging sore throat over the weekend finally going to the doctors on Tuesday to get a strong dose of antibiotics.

 

He looks so sad, unable to swallow and drink, but why is it men seem to look more sad and unable to do things than us women.  I hate the fact he has had to run after me while I couldn't walk but I don't think my demure (for want of a better word) was as sad or is as sad as his.

 

Men are certainly wired differently to us, hence why men deal with mesothelioma so differently than the growing number of women who have it.

 

I have managed to go to work this week, although yesterday I could have stayed home.  I went to the physio on Monday and I swear what the one on Thursday put right she has put wrong again, I just want this whole problem to go away but it does seem two steps forward and one step back. 

 

One good thing about hubby being ill he won't move from in front of the TV so he waited patiently for the article on Mesothelioma being discussed in the House of Commons, after some two hours it was brought up for less than 3 seconds, only to be passed to the House of Lords.  Well I am pleased he watched it and not I!

 

It seems the government are looking to put compensation in place for those who haven't an company they can seek compensation from.  I was hoping the debate was going to be on spending more money for much needed research.

 

I have heard from a gentleman in Germany who is looking at the following treatment for a family member,  although another USA product it seems like the trials will go international.

http://www.asbestos.com/news/2013/01/25/verastem-inc-to-begin-developing-novel-mesothelioma-drug/

I am not sure whether this is something that is being developed in Wales under a different pharmaceutical company.

 

Guess that's all from me today, another day in the office but my do I wish I could put my feet up.  At least I can walk again.

 

mesothelioma-Is it winter already?- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Is it winter already?- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Is it winter already?- JUSTICEWORLD

Last night I did something I haven't done for a long time, drank and drank again.  It started with making my Maltese style lasagne, it had red wine in, so with dinner I asked hubby did he want something to drink he said Bacardi and Coke so I thought why not, I'll join him.  That was at 7 pm, we went to bed at 1.15, I haven't been that late up for so many years I can't even remember.  I've been worried about hubby recently, feeling that something was going on with him and he isn't talking about it.  Last night we talked, boy did we talk.

 

I said some time back he didn't want me to have the latest scan and to wait to have my scans till after the summer months but I didn't want to.  He feels that if I know there is growth it will spoil my holidays whereas I told him I need a time marker, if it is growing we can monitor it's rate of growth much easier than just waiting till September and finding out it has grown and to what extent.  Not that I believe the mesothelioma is going to grow. 

 

Having had mixed meso in 04 I have been extremely lucky and to be honest if the meso does return I would rather monitor it again like I did last year and hold back on treatment till after Summer, but we need to know the rate of growth, so scans are important. 

 

It's back to the what if's again, if the meso was to grow do and if we leave the meso to grow for too long will chemo be as affective or if we dive straight in for treatment are we using up all our options.  This cancer hasn't any choices in the chemo regime and our bodies become used to the poison, results each time being less than the first time the chemical was introduced to the system.

 

I think we came to that understanding again of enough talked about for the time being on mesothelioma, lets enjoy the summer and worry about meso in Autumn.  Easier said than done because I know both of us think of it everyday or deal with something related to it. 

 

The other problem about drinking last night is all the good work of keeping my foot in the right position, Achilles heel pain had gone by last night, I have undone some of the work!  My bum and thigh are tender together with my back.  I was thinking of cancelling the Monday appointment with the physio and wait to see the Doctor's physio on Thursday, now am not so sure, although he seems to have done the best treatment but then it could be the use of both that has worked so well! 

 

We were due to go to a point to point today but having a bad foot I had to turn the tickets down, so glad I did, looking at the rain still coming down.  The BBC certainly got the forecast right last night, it did start at 11 and is still pouring down now.  Wonder what I can do today, I imagine both of us will be on that sofa at some point catching up on sleep!

Last night I did something I haven't done for a long time, drank and drank again.  It started with making my Maltese style lasagne, it had red wine in, so with dinner I asked hubby did he want something to drink he said Bacardi and Coke so I thought why not, I'll join him.  That was at 7 pm, we went to bed at 1.15, I haven't been that late up for so many years I can't even remember.  I've been worried about hubby recently, feeling that something was going on with him and he isn't talking about it.  Last night we talked, boy did we talk.

 

I said some time back he didn't want me to have the latest scan and to wait to have my scans till after the summer months but I didn't want to.  He feels that if I know there is growth it will spoil my holidays whereas I told him I need a time marker, if it is growing we can monitor it's rate of growth much easier than just waiting till September and finding out it has grown and to what extent.  Not that I believe the mesothelioma is going to grow. 

 

Having had mixed meso in 04 I have been extremely lucky and to be honest if the meso does return I would rather monitor it again like I did last year and hold back on treatment till after Summer, but we need to know the rate of growth, so scans are important. 

 

It's back to the what if's again, if the meso was to grow do and if we leave the meso to grow for too long will chemo be as affective or if we dive straight in for treatment are we using up all our options.  This cancer hasn't any choices in the chemo regime and our bodies become used to the poison, results each time being less than the first time the chemical was introduced to the system.

 

I think we came to that understanding again of enough talked about for the time being on mesothelioma, lets enjoy the summer and worry about meso in Autumn.  Easier said than done because I know both of us think of it everyday or deal with something related to it. 

 

The other problem about drinking last night is all the good work of keeping my foot in the right position, Achilles heel pain had gone by last night, I have undone some of the work!  My bum and thigh are tender together with my back.  I was thinking of cancelling the Monday appointment with the physio and wait to see the Doctor's physio on Thursday, now am not so sure, although he seems to have done the best treatment but then it could be the use of both that has worked so well! 

 

We were due to go to a point to point today but having a bad foot I had to turn the tickets down, so glad I did, looking at the rain still coming down.  The BBC certainly got the forecast right last night, it did start at 11 and is still pouring down now.  Wonder what I can do today, I imagine both of us will be on that sofa at some point catching up on sleep!

Last night I did something I haven't done for a long time, drank and drank again.  It started with making my Maltese style lasagne, it had red wine in, so with dinner I asked hubby did he want something to drink he said Bacardi and Coke so I thought why not, I'll join him.  That was at 7 pm, we went to bed at 1.15, I haven't been that late up for so many years I can't even remember.  I've been worried about hubby recently, feeling that something was going on with him and he isn't talking about it.  Last night we talked, boy did we talk.

 

I said some time back he didn't want me to have the latest scan and to wait to have my scans till after the summer months but I didn't want to.  He feels that if I know there is growth it will spoil my holidays whereas I told him I need a time marker, if it is growing we can monitor it's rate of growth much easier than just waiting till September and finding out it has grown and to what extent.  Not that I believe the mesothelioma is going to grow. 

 

Having had mixed meso in 04 I have been extremely lucky and to be honest if the meso does return I would rather monitor it again like I did last year and hold back on treatment till after Summer, but we need to know the rate of growth, so scans are important. 

 

It's back to the what if's again, if the meso was to grow do and if we leave the meso to grow for too long will chemo be as affective or if we dive straight in for treatment are we using up all our options.  This cancer hasn't any choices in the chemo regime and our bodies become used to the poison, results each time being less than the first time the chemical was introduced to the system.

 

I think we came to that understanding again of enough talked about for the time being on mesothelioma, lets enjoy the summer and worry about meso in Autumn.  Easier said than done because I know both of us think of it everyday or deal with something related to it. 

 

The other problem about drinking last night is all the good work of keeping my foot in the right position, Achilles heel pain had gone by last night, I have undone some of the work!  My bum and thigh are tender together with my back.  I was thinking of cancelling the Monday appointment with the physio and wait to see the Doctor's physio on Thursday, now am not so sure, although he seems to have done the best treatment but then it could be the use of both that has worked so well! 

 

We were due to go to a point to point today but having a bad foot I had to turn the tickets down, so glad I did, looking at the rain still coming down.  The BBC certainly got the forecast right last night, it did start at 11 and is still pouring down now.  Wonder what I can do today, I imagine both of us will be on that sofa at some point catching up on sleep!

mesothelioma-Pains and more pains- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Pains and more pains- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Pains and more pains- JUSTICEWORLD

I feel like a little spoilt brat at the moment because I am going to whinge about pain, my leg has got no better and now what feels like my Achilles heel is injured, which because of the way I am having to walk is making my leg hurt even more, now not only the top of my thigh but my bum, back, shin and of course the heel itself are either throbbing or aching or feel like I have a Chinese burn going on inside.

 

I really just can't stand any more pain, my ribs on the left feel inflamed, Monday I felt like I was coming down with cold and felt miserable, taking night nurse and diazepam because my body was going into overdrive.  How do people cope, I just don't know anymore.  I know I am fed up of pain, one seems to fade into the background as another appears, its a long road that never ends.

 

At present my chest feels like it has been in a vice on the left side, on a morning that takes a good hour before I feel like I have room to sit straight, but then it aches.  I don't want to start taking more morphine I just want to understand why pain is increasing, after all my last scan said I was inactive, ok haven't results for this, but am hoping for the same.

 

Maybe if it was a one off that we do go through, everyone has aches and pains sometimes in their lives, but I just feel I have been dealt the must unluckiest hand given.  I know that sounds self pitying but today that's how I feel.  I feel bad for hubby too, he sits there and can't do anything, I feel like he is having to become a servant for my needs and that isn't right.

 

Even my bum cheek hurts now, and as always its the left, my fear's are growing, I had the worst nightmare last night, probably brought on by my fear that is racing round my head, what if the meso has got to my spine?  If it is resting on a nerve in my back maybe I can get a nerve block for it but what if it isn't.  I have considered it not being connected but then why my left and why where the bottom of lung is where all the nerves are gathered in one big block. 

 

I so want to be pain free, to live and not be sat here feeling so sorry for myself.  What makes it worse is I know many meso warriors are going through much worse but even that thought isn't stopping me feeling like this.  Dear God please take the pain away.  Even sitting is painful.

 

Just had to get this off my chest because my mind is buzzing with meso.  Somewhere inside I know that a spot of nerve pain can be caused by no other reason than a stretch but its been weeks since it started, 4 physio appointments later and I am worse.

 

So my mood is that of the weather, grey and miserable.

I feel like a little spoilt brat at the moment because I am going to whinge about pain, my leg has got no better and now what feels like my Achilles heel is injured, which because of the way I am having to walk is making my leg hurt even more, now not only the top of my thigh but my bum, back, shin and of course the heel itself are either throbbing or aching or feel like I have a Chinese burn going on inside.

 

I really just can't stand any more pain, my ribs on the left feel inflamed, Monday I felt like I was coming down with cold and felt miserable, taking night nurse and diazepam because my body was going into overdrive.  How do people cope, I just don't know anymore.  I know I am fed up of pain, one seems to fade into the background as another appears, its a long road that never ends.

 

At present my chest feels like it has been in a vice on the left side, on a morning that takes a good hour before I feel like I have room to sit straight, but then it aches.  I don't want to start taking more morphine I just want to understand why pain is increasing, after all my last scan said I was inactive, ok haven't results for this, but am hoping for the same.

 

Maybe if it was a one off that we do go through, everyone has aches and pains sometimes in their lives, but I just feel I have been dealt the must unluckiest hand given.  I know that sounds self pitying but today that's how I feel.  I feel bad for hubby too, he sits there and can't do anything, I feel like he is having to become a servant for my needs and that isn't right.

 

Even my bum cheek hurts now, and as always its the left, my fear's are growing, I had the worst nightmare last night, probably brought on by my fear that is racing round my head, what if the meso has got to my spine?  If it is resting on a nerve in my back maybe I can get a nerve block for it but what if it isn't.  I have considered it not being connected but then why my left and why where the bottom of lung is where all the nerves are gathered in one big block. 

 

I so want to be pain free, to live and not be sat here feeling so sorry for myself.  What makes it worse is I know many meso warriors are going through much worse but even that thought isn't stopping me feeling like this.  Dear God please take the pain away.  Even sitting is painful.

 

Just had to get this off my chest because my mind is buzzing with meso.  Somewhere inside I know that a spot of nerve pain can be caused by no other reason than a stretch but its been weeks since it started, 4 physio appointments later and I am worse.

 

So my mood is that of the weather, grey and miserable.

I feel like a little spoilt brat at the moment because I am going to whinge about pain, my leg has got no better and now what feels like my Achilles heel is injured, which because of the way I am having to walk is making my leg hurt even more, now not only the top of my thigh but my bum, back, shin and of course the heel itself are either throbbing or aching or feel like I have a Chinese burn going on inside.

 

I really just can't stand any more pain, my ribs on the left feel inflamed, Monday I felt like I was coming down with cold and felt miserable, taking night nurse and diazepam because my body was going into overdrive.  How do people cope, I just don't know anymore.  I know I am fed up of pain, one seems to fade into the background as another appears, its a long road that never ends.

 

At present my chest feels like it has been in a vice on the left side, on a morning that takes a good hour before I feel like I have room to sit straight, but then it aches.  I don't want to start taking more morphine I just want to understand why pain is increasing, after all my last scan said I was inactive, ok haven't results for this, but am hoping for the same.

 

Maybe if it was a one off that we do go through, everyone has aches and pains sometimes in their lives, but I just feel I have been dealt the must unluckiest hand given.  I know that sounds self pitying but today that's how I feel.  I feel bad for hubby too, he sits there and can't do anything, I feel like he is having to become a servant for my needs and that isn't right.

 

Even my bum cheek hurts now, and as always its the left, my fear's are growing, I had the worst nightmare last night, probably brought on by my fear that is racing round my head, what if the meso has got to my spine?  If it is resting on a nerve in my back maybe I can get a nerve block for it but what if it isn't.  I have considered it not being connected but then why my left and why where the bottom of lung is where all the nerves are gathered in one big block. 

 

I so want to be pain free, to live and not be sat here feeling so sorry for myself.  What makes it worse is I know many meso warriors are going through much worse but even that thought isn't stopping me feeling like this.  Dear God please take the pain away.  Even sitting is painful.

 

Just had to get this off my chest because my mind is buzzing with meso.  Somewhere inside I know that a spot of nerve pain can be caused by no other reason than a stretch but its been weeks since it started, 4 physio appointments later and I am worse.

 

So my mood is that of the weather, grey and miserable.

mesothelioma-Problems with life- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Problems with life- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Problems with life- JUSTICEWORLD

Life with mesothelioma is never an easy road to travel.  The community of meso warriors are all involved in one form of treatment or another.  Decisions to be made on surgery or chemotherapy, then those who are doing well and haven't had treatment for years against those who just can't get the meso into a status of inactive.  The one thing all of us have in common is that we just don't know what is going to happen next.

 

A friend of mine went through surgery a year ago, although she too had a rough journey, her lung didn't want to stick back to the ribs either and spent quite a long time in hospital with a tube in, (thankfully I came home with mine), but she is having problems with her breathing.  The CT Scan isn't showing anything unusual but she feels herself that something is wrong.  Her weight has dropped, which I told her would be expected.  The weight loss doesn't seem to happen at the time of surgery but quite a few months to a year later, those lbs start falling.  This is caused by trauma to the body, it takes the body a while before it picks up on this, the brain deals with the surgery first, then the pain etc but sometime along the line our body then goes "hey something happened to me" and hence we have weight loss.  Had better write here this is my opinion only and gathered by only a few people I know who have had surgery including myself.  But I am worried about her, and asked her to ask for a second opinion.  CT Scan's can only show growth if it is over 3mm or the cut has happened in the right place, (the time the CT Scan takes it's snapshot).  It only takes 1mm of meso to make us uncomfortable, I should know as I felt mine return in the beginning of 2010 and then my USA radiologist noticed it in the April, it was a lot bigger in the December when my UK radiologist mentioned it.

 

Then you hear of other friends who are trying different treatments or have catheters in place to drain the fluid that gathers in the pleura space.  Mesothelioma makes pockets and it can be quite difficult for the catheters to do their work as the fluid can't drain the individual pockets.  This in turn makes breathing hard again. 

 

Many are currently going through chemo, the loss of hair sometimes can be distressing, my hair is fine and so when I brushed my hair or ran my hand through it and had loads of hair drop out it worried me, on our treatment we don't go bald but shed quite a lot.

 

Then the worry of if the chemotherapy will actually work, we know that Alimta (Pemetrexed) doesn't work for everyone.  One of the Warriors will be using a different chemo this time (4th line) and I for on am eager to see if it works.  Although my other friend has just finished his 4th line with a 3 chemical infusion and so far is inactive but didn't get the shrinkage which we all hope for.

 

I guess I am slightly worried, my scan was last Tuesday and although my oncologist is away I am hoping my gp will give me the results.  I have had some changes, I have to hope this is something to do with age and not the meso.  My worry is still this leg, what if the meso has grown and is now resting on another nerve?  Also a few new tighter pains in those left ribs, but that could be to do with my fat belly, see we all live in hope when we have this cancer.

 

It's Monday already and I have a busy week ahead, having been out of the office for nearly 3 weeks, I did get in a couple of half days so tonight I will probably come home and crash on the sofa.  I am having trouble with my eyes at the moment, they get tired looking at the screen but if I put on glasses I can't see as they are for distance, I guess I need an appointment, will be quite hard I guess to match my eyes as I don't need anything to read things on my desk or in my hand only the screen.

 

Have a good week everyone, don't forget to drop in on my warrior friends blogs and catch what they are up to.

Life with mesothelioma is never an easy road to travel.  The community of meso warriors are all involved in one form of treatment or another.  Decisions to be made on surgery or chemotherapy, then those who are doing well and haven't had treatment for years against those who just can't get the meso into a status of inactive.  The one thing all of us have in common is that we just don't know what is going to happen next.

 

A friend of mine went through surgery a year ago, although she too had a rough journey, her lung didn't want to stick back to the ribs either and spent quite a long time in hospital with a tube in, (thankfully I came home with mine), but she is having problems with her breathing.  The CT Scan isn't showing anything unusual but she feels herself that something is wrong.  Her weight has dropped, which I told her would be expected.  The weight loss doesn't seem to happen at the time of surgery but quite a few months to a year later, those lbs start falling.  This is caused by trauma to the body, it takes the body a while before it picks up on this, the brain deals with the surgery first, then the pain etc but sometime along the line our body then goes "hey something happened to me" and hence we have weight loss.  Had better write here this is my opinion only and gathered by only a few people I know who have had surgery including myself.  But I am worried about her, and asked her to ask for a second opinion.  CT Scan's can only show growth if it is over 3mm or the cut has happened in the right place, (the time the CT Scan takes it's snapshot).  It only takes 1mm of meso to make us uncomfortable, I should know as I felt mine return in the beginning of 2010 and then my USA radiologist noticed it in the April, it was a lot bigger in the December when my UK radiologist mentioned it.

 

Then you hear of other friends who are trying different treatments or have catheters in place to drain the fluid that gathers in the pleura space.  Mesothelioma makes pockets and it can be quite difficult for the catheters to do their work as the fluid can't drain the individual pockets.  This in turn makes breathing hard again. 

 

Many are currently going through chemo, the loss of hair sometimes can be distressing, my hair is fine and so when I brushed my hair or ran my hand through it and had loads of hair drop out it worried me, on our treatment we don't go bald but shed quite a lot.

 

Then the worry of if the chemotherapy will actually work, we know that Alimta (Pemetrexed) doesn't work for everyone.  One of the Warriors will be using a different chemo this time (4th line) and I for on am eager to see if it works.  Although my other friend has just finished his 4th line with a 3 chemical infusion and so far is inactive but didn't get the shrinkage which we all hope for.

 

I guess I am slightly worried, my scan was last Tuesday and although my oncologist is away I am hoping my gp will give me the results.  I have had some changes, I have to hope this is something to do with age and not the meso.  My worry is still this leg, what if the meso has grown and is now resting on another nerve?  Also a few new tighter pains in those left ribs, but that could be to do with my fat belly, see we all live in hope when we have this cancer.

 

It's Monday already and I have a busy week ahead, having been out of the office for nearly 3 weeks, I did get in a couple of half days so tonight I will probably come home and crash on the sofa.  I am having trouble with my eyes at the moment, they get tired looking at the screen but if I put on glasses I can't see as they are for distance, I guess I need an appointment, will be quite hard I guess to match my eyes as I don't need anything to read things on my desk or in my hand only the screen.

 

Have a good week everyone, don't forget to drop in on my warrior friends blogs and catch what they are up to.

Life with mesothelioma is never an easy road to travel.  The community of meso warriors are all involved in one form of treatment or another.  Decisions to be made on surgery or chemotherapy, then those who are doing well and haven't had treatment for years against those who just can't get the meso into a status of inactive.  The one thing all of us have in common is that we just don't know what is going to happen next.

 

A friend of mine went through surgery a year ago, although she too had a rough journey, her lung didn't want to stick back to the ribs either and spent quite a long time in hospital with a tube in, (thankfully I came home with mine), but she is having problems with her breathing.  The CT Scan isn't showing anything unusual but she feels herself that something is wrong.  Her weight has dropped, which I told her would be expected.  The weight loss doesn't seem to happen at the time of surgery but quite a few months to a year later, those lbs start falling.  This is caused by trauma to the body, it takes the body a while before it picks up on this, the brain deals with the surgery first, then the pain etc but sometime along the line our body then goes "hey something happened to me" and hence we have weight loss.  Had better write here this is my opinion only and gathered by only a few people I know who have had surgery including myself.  But I am worried about her, and asked her to ask for a second opinion.  CT Scan's can only show growth if it is over 3mm or the cut has happened in the right place, (the time the CT Scan takes it's snapshot).  It only takes 1mm of meso to make us uncomfortable, I should know as I felt mine return in the beginning of 2010 and then my USA radiologist noticed it in the April, it was a lot bigger in the December when my UK radiologist mentioned it.

 

Then you hear of other friends who are trying different treatments or have catheters in place to drain the fluid that gathers in the pleura space.  Mesothelioma makes pockets and it can be quite difficult for the catheters to do their work as the fluid can't drain the individual pockets.  This in turn makes breathing hard again. 

 

Many are currently going through chemo, the loss of hair sometimes can be distressing, my hair is fine and so when I brushed my hair or ran my hand through it and had loads of hair drop out it worried me, on our treatment we don't go bald but shed quite a lot.

 

Then the worry of if the chemotherapy will actually work, we know that Alimta (Pemetrexed) doesn't work for everyone.  One of the Warriors will be using a different chemo this time (4th line) and I for on am eager to see if it works.  Although my other friend has just finished his 4th line with a 3 chemical infusion and so far is inactive but didn't get the shrinkage which we all hope for.

 

I guess I am slightly worried, my scan was last Tuesday and although my oncologist is away I am hoping my gp will give me the results.  I have had some changes, I have to hope this is something to do with age and not the meso.  My worry is still this leg, what if the meso has grown and is now resting on another nerve?  Also a few new tighter pains in those left ribs, but that could be to do with my fat belly, see we all live in hope when we have this cancer.

 

It's Monday already and I have a busy week ahead, having been out of the office for nearly 3 weeks, I did get in a couple of half days so tonight I will probably come home and crash on the sofa.  I am having trouble with my eyes at the moment, they get tired looking at the screen but if I put on glasses I can't see as they are for distance, I guess I need an appointment, will be quite hard I guess to match my eyes as I don't need anything to read things on my desk or in my hand only the screen.

 

Have a good week everyone, don't forget to drop in on my warrior friends blogs and catch what they are up to.

mesothelioma-Out in Paperback The DreamWeaver's Choice- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Out in Paperback The DreamWeaver's Choice- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Out in Paperback The DreamWeaver's Choice- JUSTICEWORLD

My book has arrived, all nice and printed and ready to for sale.  After a few problems on paypal I have it up for sale but heavens knows what has happened on Amazon.

 

I set it up (I think) when young Jack came to help do some changes, but can I remember about it - no, so trying to get back into Amazon on the paperback is impossible.  Also a friend in the States tried to buy it, they accepted the order a month ago but never sent details onwards.  This has been quite a concern so today, if I can get my brain to work, I am going back in and deleting to start again for the Paperback.

 

Liz, my good friend and proof reader, has taken away some 38 books to sell, Chris Knighton will be receiving 250 to start with for the MKMRF to sell at the up and coming events which leaves me the rest to hope people will buy.

 

Many are still old fashioned and like to have a book in front of them rather than the kindle version, although the Kindle Version will ultimately make more cash for the fund as there are no p&p costs associated with it.

 

If you don't like vampires, then think of the characters as assassins for the government or treat the book as a spy thriller, come on please get behind me on this and lets get funds in for the charity.

 

On a sad note have just heard my best friend lost one of her german shepherds during the night, today will be hard for her and her hubby, our dogs are family.  I dread the day when we lose our Lexi, it was 4 years this month since we lost our Tyke and the pain is still in our hearts.?

My book has arrived, all nice and printed and ready to for sale.  After a few problems on paypal I have it up for sale but heavens knows what has happened on Amazon.

 

I set it up (I think) when young Jack came to help do some changes, but can I remember about it - no, so trying to get back into Amazon on the paperback is impossible.  Also a friend in the States tried to buy it, they accepted the order a month ago but never sent details onwards.  This has been quite a concern so today, if I can get my brain to work, I am going back in and deleting to start again for the Paperback.

 

Liz, my good friend and proof reader, has taken away some 38 books to sell, Chris Knighton will be receiving 250 to start with for the MKMRF to sell at the up and coming events which leaves me the rest to hope people will buy.

 

Many are still old fashioned and like to have a book in front of them rather than the kindle version, although the Kindle Version will ultimately make more cash for the fund as there are no p&p costs associated with it.

 

If you don't like vampires, then think of the characters as assassins for the government or treat the book as a spy thriller, come on please get behind me on this and lets get funds in for the charity.

 

On a sad note have just heard my best friend lost one of her german shepherds during the night, today will be hard for her and her hubby, our dogs are family.  I dread the day when we lose our Lexi, it was 4 years this month since we lost our Tyke and the pain is still in our hearts.?

My book has arrived, all nice and printed and ready to for sale.  After a few problems on paypal I have it up for sale but heavens knows what has happened on Amazon.

 

I set it up (I think) when young Jack came to help do some changes, but can I remember about it - no, so trying to get back into Amazon on the paperback is impossible.  Also a friend in the States tried to buy it, they accepted the order a month ago but never sent details onwards.  This has been quite a concern so today, if I can get my brain to work, I am going back in and deleting to start again for the Paperback.

 

Liz, my good friend and proof reader, has taken away some 38 books to sell, Chris Knighton will be receiving 250 to start with for the MKMRF to sell at the up and coming events which leaves me the rest to hope people will buy.

 

Many are still old fashioned and like to have a book in front of them rather than the kindle version, although the Kindle Version will ultimately make more cash for the fund as there are no p&p costs associated with it.

 

If you don't like vampires, then think of the characters as assassins for the government or treat the book as a spy thriller, come on please get behind me on this and lets get funds in for the charity.

 

On a sad note have just heard my best friend lost one of her german shepherds during the night, today will be hard for her and her hubby, our dogs are family.  I dread the day when we lose our Lexi, it was 4 years this month since we lost our Tyke and the pain is still in our hearts.?

mesothelioma-The British Sun Pipped Out- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-The British Sun Pipped Out- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-The British Sun Pipped Out- JUSTICEWORLD

Home is where the heart is, in our case as well our beautiful dogs, but the sun has gone away again.  The beautiful heat and sun on holiday made my back feel much better, I didn't seem to wake up with as many pains in the ribs, only my leg!  We came home to sunshine and I thought yeah I can enjoy the feeling, but alas the sun is out till 10 then rain up here in the North of England.

 

We have guests who are ex pats from Australia and currently live in Asia, they have come to see us after meeting us last September and are having a relax.  There we were planning trips here and there and they just want to relax and play with the dogs. 

 

Today my book is being delivered here from the printers, I can't wait.  I have received an unbounded copy just to set my mind at rest the printing on the pages didn't miss out my first sentences.  I am pleased they are arriving and hope that I can meet up with Chris Knighton to give her quite a few to sell at her forthcoming events. 

 

I was going to cancel my physio with having guests but as we aren't doing much running around I may as well keep hold of the appointment and see if they can do anything else. 

 

I went for my scan on Tuesday, I was so pleased Jean was again the nurse in charge of the needle.  I had my elma cream on and off she went.  She told me the vein in my left arm is starting to move and become hard, probably due to the last chemo and the amount of times it has been used over the years.  I thought she was going to have to start probing to get the tip in but she told me after she had got it.  I didn't think veins could move the moment the needle went through the skin, you learn something everyday.  She is a wonderful lady who is now reducing her hours, I just hope that she is on when I need my next scan, I never have a problem with needles in this department, but there again she has administered about 95% of them over the years.  She lost her husband a couple of years ago, just as they were planning retirements, why does life do that?

 

It's 8 years since my Dad died today, I still remember the call at 7.30, I hadn't been that long since my last chemo treatment and I remember I hadn't really got dressed, just pulled on some joggers as my brother came to get me.  I think I was in shock, I had seen him only the day before but something told me then that I may not see him again, one of those 6th sense feelings.  I wanted to go back and see him but hubby told me I was being emotional due to the chemo, how wrong he was and how right I was.  I think he had given up, he died of a massive stroke, he was far to young at 74.  I am sure he felt guilty for my illness and that brought about his own demise.  Guilt eats us up and I wish I could lose this negative feeling.

 

It seems quite a few warriors are going through a hard time at the moment, Tess, Mavis and Debbie are on or starting another round of chemo, I am pleased to say Ray and Steve are at the moment doing well, I hope that I too will get a good result even though I fear I have a little growth, as long as it remains slow growing then it isn't too much of a worry as yet.  I have received some good news from a friend in the states, she has been receiving a new treatment at Sloan Kettering and is still stable, hopefully this drug will come into its own and maybe be the one that turns meso from a terminal to a chronicle disease.  My other friend's husband is having a lot of fluid around the lung.  Back in 04 after my surgery I had fluid, but they couldn't drain it as the fluid had gathered in pockets, now from this friend, I understand those pockets are fissures created by the meso.  It is frightening when you can't get fluid out, quite a few people I know tap fluid on a daily basis.  This to me is a brave thing, how they can have an alien tap fitted to them scares me.  My body can't stand cannula's inside my veins so imagine having a tap constantly attached.

 

On such a note I guess I will close for today but post a picture to remind me of the lovely weather we left behind together with the new friends we met on the cruise.

Don't I look healthy, I did look funny in the bikini where I had remembered to cover some of the radiation patches and not others and also burnt.  My skin has changed again due to the recent chemo, so if you are out sunbathing remember to use factor 50 on scars and radiation patches, 30 and 20 on the rest of you.  Don't miss any parts of the skin otherwise you will end up multi-coloured!

Maybe I am getting a little to old to wear such clothes!

Home is where the heart is, in our case as well our beautiful dogs, but the sun has gone away again.  The beautiful heat and sun on holiday made my back feel much better, I didn't seem to wake up with as many pains in the ribs, only my leg!  We came home to sunshine and I thought yeah I can enjoy the feeling, but alas the sun is out till 10 then rain up here in the North of England.

 

We have guests who are ex pats from Australia and currently live in Asia, they have come to see us after meeting us last September and are having a relax.  There we were planning trips here and there and they just want to relax and play with the dogs. 

 

Today my book is being delivered here from the printers, I can't wait.  I have received an unbounded copy just to set my mind at rest the printing on the pages didn't miss out my first sentences.  I am pleased they are arriving and hope that I can meet up with Chris Knighton to give her quite a few to sell at her forthcoming events. 

 

I was going to cancel my physio with having guests but as we aren't doing much running around I may as well keep hold of the appointment and see if they can do anything else. 

 

I went for my scan on Tuesday, I was so pleased Jean was again the nurse in charge of the needle.  I had my elma cream on and off she went.  She told me the vein in my left arm is starting to move and become hard, probably due to the last chemo and the amount of times it has been used over the years.  I thought she was going to have to start probing to get the tip in but she told me after she had got it.  I didn't think veins could move the moment the needle went through the skin, you learn something everyday.  She is a wonderful lady who is now reducing her hours, I just hope that she is on when I need my next scan, I never have a problem with needles in this department, but there again she has administered about 95% of them over the years.  She lost her husband a couple of years ago, just as they were planning retirements, why does life do that?

 

It's 8 years since my Dad died today, I still remember the call at 7.30, I hadn't been that long since my last chemo treatment and I remember I hadn't really got dressed, just pulled on some joggers as my brother came to get me.  I think I was in shock, I had seen him only the day before but something told me then that I may not see him again, one of those 6th sense feelings.  I wanted to go back and see him but hubby told me I was being emotional due to the chemo, how wrong he was and how right I was.  I think he had given up, he died of a massive stroke, he was far to young at 74.  I am sure he felt guilty for my illness and that brought about his own demise.  Guilt eats us up and I wish I could lose this negative feeling.

 

It seems quite a few warriors are going through a hard time at the moment, Tess, Mavis and Debbie are on or starting another round of chemo, I am pleased to say Ray and Steve are at the moment doing well, I hope that I too will get a good result even though I fear I have a little growth, as long as it remains slow growing then it isn't too much of a worry as yet.  I have received some good news from a friend in the states, she has been receiving a new treatment at Sloan Kettering and is still stable, hopefully this drug will come into its own and maybe be the one that turns meso from a terminal to a chronicle disease.  My other friend's husband is having a lot of fluid around the lung.  Back in 04 after my surgery I had fluid, but they couldn't drain it as the fluid had gathered in pockets, now from this friend, I understand those pockets are fissures created by the meso.  It is frightening when you can't get fluid out, quite a few people I know tap fluid on a daily basis.  This to me is a brave thing, how they can have an alien tap fitted to them scares me.  My body can't stand cannula's inside my veins so imagine having a tap constantly attached.

 

On such a note I guess I will close for today but post a picture to remind me of the lovely weather we left behind together with the new friends we met on the cruise.

Don't I look healthy, I did look funny in the bikini where I had remembered to cover some of the radiation patches and not others and also burnt.  My skin has changed again due to the recent chemo, so if you are out sunbathing remember to use factor 50 on scars and radiation patches, 30 and 20 on the rest of you.  Don't miss any parts of the skin otherwise you will end up multi-coloured!

Maybe I am getting a little to old to wear such clothes!

Home is where the heart is, in our case as well our beautiful dogs, but the sun has gone away again.  The beautiful heat and sun on holiday made my back feel much better, I didn't seem to wake up with as many pains in the ribs, only my leg!  We came home to sunshine and I thought yeah I can enjoy the feeling, but alas the sun is out till 10 then rain up here in the North of England.

 

We have guests who are ex pats from Australia and currently live in Asia, they have come to see us after meeting us last September and are having a relax.  There we were planning trips here and there and they just want to relax and play with the dogs. 

 

Today my book is being delivered here from the printers, I can't wait.  I have received an unbounded copy just to set my mind at rest the printing on the pages didn't miss out my first sentences.  I am pleased they are arriving and hope that I can meet up with Chris Knighton to give her quite a few to sell at her forthcoming events. 

 

I was going to cancel my physio with having guests but as we aren't doing much running around I may as well keep hold of the appointment and see if they can do anything else. 

 

I went for my scan on Tuesday, I was so pleased Jean was again the nurse in charge of the needle.  I had my elma cream on and off she went.  She told me the vein in my left arm is starting to move and become hard, probably due to the last chemo and the amount of times it has been used over the years.  I thought she was going to have to start probing to get the tip in but she told me after she had got it.  I didn't think veins could move the moment the needle went through the skin, you learn something everyday.  She is a wonderful lady who is now reducing her hours, I just hope that she is on when I need my next scan, I never have a problem with needles in this department, but there again she has administered about 95% of them over the years.  She lost her husband a couple of years ago, just as they were planning retirements, why does life do that?

 

It's 8 years since my Dad died today, I still remember the call at 7.30, I hadn't been that long since my last chemo treatment and I remember I hadn't really got dressed, just pulled on some joggers as my brother came to get me.  I think I was in shock, I had seen him only the day before but something told me then that I may not see him again, one of those 6th sense feelings.  I wanted to go back and see him but hubby told me I was being emotional due to the chemo, how wrong he was and how right I was.  I think he had given up, he died of a massive stroke, he was far to young at 74.  I am sure he felt guilty for my illness and that brought about his own demise.  Guilt eats us up and I wish I could lose this negative feeling.

 

It seems quite a few warriors are going through a hard time at the moment, Tess, Mavis and Debbie are on or starting another round of chemo, I am pleased to say Ray and Steve are at the moment doing well, I hope that I too will get a good result even though I fear I have a little growth, as long as it remains slow growing then it isn't too much of a worry as yet.  I have received some good news from a friend in the states, she has been receiving a new treatment at Sloan Kettering and is still stable, hopefully this drug will come into its own and maybe be the one that turns meso from a terminal to a chronicle disease.  My other friend's husband is having a lot of fluid around the lung.  Back in 04 after my surgery I had fluid, but they couldn't drain it as the fluid had gathered in pockets, now from this friend, I understand those pockets are fissures created by the meso.  It is frightening when you can't get fluid out, quite a few people I know tap fluid on a daily basis.  This to me is a brave thing, how they can have an alien tap fitted to them scares me.  My body can't stand cannula's inside my veins so imagine having a tap constantly attached.

 

On such a note I guess I will close for today but post a picture to remind me of the lovely weather we left behind together with the new friends we met on the cruise.

Don't I look healthy, I did look funny in the bikini where I had remembered to cover some of the radiation patches and not others and also burnt.  My skin has changed again due to the recent chemo, so if you are out sunbathing remember to use factor 50 on scars and radiation patches, 30 and 20 on the rest of you.  Don't miss any parts of the skin otherwise you will end up multi-coloured!

Maybe I am getting a little to old to wear such clothes!

mesothelioma-Home Again- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Home Again- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Home Again- JUSTICEWORLD

Why is it the days seem to roll into one when you are coming to the end of your holidays and what you did on day one you can't remember.  The holiday is truly over and this morning I will call in to work to try and catch up before Monday morning's onslaught of everyone needing a piece of me.

 

I have to say I have enjoyed the time away, ok a few ups and downs, my leg being the most annoying and hopefully when I see the physio on Thursday I may get some relief as the massages didn't really do it.

 

The internet access drove me to distraction along with only having the Ipad to work with, how many of you can use this for typing and emailing I just don't know, I found it hard going most of the time.  I wish I could say to Amanda I have brought the sunshine back for you in a big bottle but unfortunately it never seems to reach us, as we flew through the blue sky's yesterday across from Italy I thought hey it may be nice and sunny in good old blighty but as we crossed the white cliffs banks of cloud approached us.  In fact our decent was through heavy thick cloud that whipped the plane or way and another.

 

I read a couple of good articles on living after cancer and one on MKMRF.  Living with mesothelioma certainly has it's ups and downs, this pain in my leg and butt cheek for instance, I am worrying, hopefully needlessly, that it is a bit of growth on the bottom left of my lung which is now pressing on a nerve instead of me perhaps doing something like sitting the wrong way and pulling a muscle.

 

The last day of our cruise was in Sorrento, but you know I just couldn't be bothered to get off the ship and visit, yes it looked lovely from out in the water and I should have made the effort but I needed a day of relaxation.  I felt guilty for not visiting but I am sure we will get there again.  We spent a cold night up on deck having dinner with people who were strangers 10 day ago but became friends over the course of the holiday.  Because of the internet I am sure we will be in touch, not like the olden days where you just could never be in touch so easily.

 

Two of the party we befriended have a large Doctor's practise in Pittsburgh, they told me they hadn't had a case of meso for ten years.  Pittsburgh was a notorious hot spot for this disease and now they have a total decline so how come the rest of the world is still on an upward rating.

 

The dog's were certainly pleased to see us, we dropped the bags off and took them straight out for a walk, I haven't seen both tails go so much from left to right for ages.  Bear ran around the fields sniffing who had been around his property over the last week, boy did he have fun, whereas Lexi stayed by our sides.

 

Well that's it for now, have a busy night tonight, a 65th birthday party to attend, just hope I don't over do myself today and find I'm tired!

 

Time for me to catch up on everyone's blogs and see what's being happening while I've been away.  I truly hope that Amanda and Ray have finally found themselves out and about enjoying themselves.

Why is it the days seem to roll into one when you are coming to the end of your holidays and what you did on day one you can't remember.  The holiday is truly over and this morning I will call in to work to try and catch up before Monday morning's onslaught of everyone needing a piece of me.

 

I have to say I have enjoyed the time away, ok a few ups and downs, my leg being the most annoying and hopefully when I see the physio on Thursday I may get some relief as the massages didn't really do it.

 

The internet access drove me to distraction along with only having the Ipad to work with, how many of you can use this for typing and emailing I just don't know, I found it hard going most of the time.  I wish I could say to Amanda I have brought the sunshine back for you in a big bottle but unfortunately it never seems to reach us, as we flew through the blue sky's yesterday across from Italy I thought hey it may be nice and sunny in good old blighty but as we crossed the white cliffs banks of cloud approached us.  In fact our decent was through heavy thick cloud that whipped the plane or way and another.

 

I read a couple of good articles on living after cancer and one on MKMRF.  Living with mesothelioma certainly has it's ups and downs, this pain in my leg and butt cheek for instance, I am worrying, hopefully needlessly, that it is a bit of growth on the bottom left of my lung which is now pressing on a nerve instead of me perhaps doing something like sitting the wrong way and pulling a muscle.

 

The last day of our cruise was in Sorrento, but you know I just couldn't be bothered to get off the ship and visit, yes it looked lovely from out in the water and I should have made the effort but I needed a day of relaxation.  I felt guilty for not visiting but I am sure we will get there again.  We spent a cold night up on deck having dinner with people who were strangers 10 day ago but became friends over the course of the holiday.  Because of the internet I am sure we will be in touch, not like the olden days where you just could never be in touch so easily.

 

Two of the party we befriended have a large Doctor's practise in Pittsburgh, they told me they hadn't had a case of meso for ten years.  Pittsburgh was a notorious hot spot for this disease and now they have a total decline so how come the rest of the world is still on an upward rating.

 

The dog's were certainly pleased to see us, we dropped the bags off and took them straight out for a walk, I haven't seen both tails go so much from left to right for ages.  Bear ran around the fields sniffing who had been around his property over the last week, boy did he have fun, whereas Lexi stayed by our sides.

 

Well that's it for now, have a busy night tonight, a 65th birthday party to attend, just hope I don't over do myself today and find I'm tired!

 

Time for me to catch up on everyone's blogs and see what's being happening while I've been away.  I truly hope that Amanda and Ray have finally found themselves out and about enjoying themselves.

Why is it the days seem to roll into one when you are coming to the end of your holidays and what you did on day one you can't remember.  The holiday is truly over and this morning I will call in to work to try and catch up before Monday morning's onslaught of everyone needing a piece of me.

 

I have to say I have enjoyed the time away, ok a few ups and downs, my leg being the most annoying and hopefully when I see the physio on Thursday I may get some relief as the massages didn't really do it.

 

The internet access drove me to distraction along with only having the Ipad to work with, how many of you can use this for typing and emailing I just don't know, I found it hard going most of the time.  I wish I could say to Amanda I have brought the sunshine back for you in a big bottle but unfortunately it never seems to reach us, as we flew through the blue sky's yesterday across from Italy I thought hey it may be nice and sunny in good old blighty but as we crossed the white cliffs banks of cloud approached us.  In fact our decent was through heavy thick cloud that whipped the plane or way and another.

 

I read a couple of good articles on living after cancer and one on MKMRF.  Living with mesothelioma certainly has it's ups and downs, this pain in my leg and butt cheek for instance, I am worrying, hopefully needlessly, that it is a bit of growth on the bottom left of my lung which is now pressing on a nerve instead of me perhaps doing something like sitting the wrong way and pulling a muscle.

 

The last day of our cruise was in Sorrento, but you know I just couldn't be bothered to get off the ship and visit, yes it looked lovely from out in the water and I should have made the effort but I needed a day of relaxation.  I felt guilty for not visiting but I am sure we will get there again.  We spent a cold night up on deck having dinner with people who were strangers 10 day ago but became friends over the course of the holiday.  Because of the internet I am sure we will be in touch, not like the olden days where you just could never be in touch so easily.

 

Two of the party we befriended have a large Doctor's practise in Pittsburgh, they told me they hadn't had a case of meso for ten years.  Pittsburgh was a notorious hot spot for this disease and now they have a total decline so how come the rest of the world is still on an upward rating.

 

The dog's were certainly pleased to see us, we dropped the bags off and took them straight out for a walk, I haven't seen both tails go so much from left to right for ages.  Bear ran around the fields sniffing who had been around his property over the last week, boy did he have fun, whereas Lexi stayed by our sides.

 

Well that's it for now, have a busy night tonight, a 65th birthday party to attend, just hope I don't over do myself today and find I'm tired!

 

Time for me to catch up on everyone's blogs and see what's being happening while I've been away.  I truly hope that Amanda and Ray have finally found themselves out and about enjoying themselves.

mesothelioma-Not in the mood- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Not in the mood- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Not in the mood- JUSTICEWORLD

Twice in one day what is going on with me, well I'm having one of those days and if you read my blog you also know this is my release, release from the anxiety meso brings.   Firstly I forgot that chemo changes our bodies, ok you say your chemo was Nov last year so what's the problem,
I burnt when normally my skin wouldn't even notice, it's the first time it has seen sunshine and those precious damaged chemo cells have never had sun on them before.  People and here I mean those around us, think they know how we feel, think because we are inactive, don't have anything wrong, they don't seem to accept that our body is working twice as hard to keep us in inactive, that we are trying our hardest to be normal, but tonight I think I have fallen off that emotional washing line, maybe I haven't changed the sheets for a long time and the line has got tight, tonight it sagged and hit rock bottom.  If I hear bless you one more time I swear I could commit murder!

But I'm on holiday so I should be happy, but holidays can be tiring, especially a cruise plus it's a place of food, walk, food, talk, shower (again) food, drink bed, shower, breakfast and on and on, I feel like a spoilt brat and probably am acting like one but I feel like I don't live my life for me, maybe tomorrow I will feel different but here now at present I feel like I am an imposter, the smile is false, the person inside just wants to shout stop the world I want to get off!

Twice in one day what is going on with me, well I'm having one of those days and if you read my blog you also know this is my release, release from the anxiety meso brings.   Firstly I forgot that chemo changes our bodies, ok you say your chemo was Nov last year so what's the problem,
I burnt when normally my skin wouldn't even notice, it's the first time it has seen sunshine and those precious damaged chemo cells have never had sun on them before.  People and here I mean those around us, think they know how we feel, think because we are inactive, don't have anything wrong, they don't seem to accept that our body is working twice as hard to keep us in inactive, that we are trying our hardest to be normal, but tonight I think I have fallen off that emotional washing line, maybe I haven't changed the sheets for a long time and the line has got tight, tonight it sagged and hit rock bottom.  If I hear bless you one more time I swear I could commit murder!

But I'm on holiday so I should be happy, but holidays can be tiring, especially a cruise plus it's a place of food, walk, food, talk, shower (again) food, drink bed, shower, breakfast and on and on, I feel like a spoilt brat and probably am acting like one but I feel like I don't live my life for me, maybe tomorrow I will feel different but here now at present I feel like I am an imposter, the smile is false, the person inside just wants to shout stop the world I want to get off!

Twice in one day what is going on with me, well I'm having one of those days and if you read my blog you also know this is my release, release from the anxiety meso brings.   Firstly I forgot that chemo changes our bodies, ok you say your chemo was Nov last year so what's the problem,
I burnt when normally my skin wouldn't even notice, it's the first time it has seen sunshine and those precious damaged chemo cells have never had sun on them before.  People and here I mean those around us, think they know how we feel, think because we are inactive, don't have anything wrong, they don't seem to accept that our body is working twice as hard to keep us in inactive, that we are trying our hardest to be normal, but tonight I think I have fallen off that emotional washing line, maybe I haven't changed the sheets for a long time and the line has got tight, tonight it sagged and hit rock bottom.  If I hear bless you one more time I swear I could commit murder!

But I'm on holiday so I should be happy, but holidays can be tiring, especially a cruise plus it's a place of food, walk, food, talk, shower (again) food, drink bed, shower, breakfast and on and on, I feel like a spoilt brat and probably am acting like one but I feel like I don't live my life for me, maybe tomorrow I will feel different but here now at present I feel like I am an imposter, the smile is false, the person inside just wants to shout stop the world I want to get off!

mesothelioma-Pain and sunshine- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Pain and sunshine- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Pain and sunshine- JUSTICEWORLD

The hot sun has certainly warmed those ribs up and taken quite a lot of the normal meso pain from the highs to the lows on the 1 to 10 scale but the pain in my butt, sorry it is a pain, and down my leg every time I sit in a certain position is driving me to distraction.  I believe the rolling of the boat has helped with the bile as I don't feel so sick on a morning.  Wonder if hubby fancies moving into a canal boat for the rest of my life!

Seriously though I moan about the cold of home and how heat helps and it truly does but the pains still haunt us.  I'm talking about pain more today because catching the few bits I can on Facebook I see Debbie is really suffering and for her through this unpredictable journey of meso, it's a first.

I have suffered pain long before diagnosis and my heart feels heavy for her, there is no golden tablet that takes it all away, it hovers even with a large dose of morphine.  Our life's are just one long round of pain, once it stops in one area it starts in the next, each nerve fighting with the next to generate the most pain and be noticed by the brain to remind us how fragile our body really is.  Pain is the ultimate bug bear of this disease in my eyes.

So another new day of exploring for us, the one thing about cruising sometimes is we dock at industrial style ports and today is one of them, just tried taking a pic but can't on the iPad!  I have been pretty much out of contact, it seems strange not having email everyday or being on Facebook for a couple of hours, technology has taken over my life.  I brought my 2nd book to edit but have I not read much, on a cruise you don't seem to find reading time.  We have made friends with some amazing people which has been wonderful.  We were supposed to have dinner with the Captain last night but were ordered to ditch him so we could all eat again together, today will be our first day alone as our new found friends have booked tours so maybe I might just get some proof reading done.

Good news too, if I haven't already posted, Debbie has also been asked to be an ambassador for Mkmrf, Hopefully this will make the charity more well known in the South of England, again helping bring more funds to keeping the tissue bank open.  

Oh well, it's a hard life for some of us, had better think about showering and having breakfast, how is it you eat much more on holiday than you ever do at home?  Hubby's pot belly has increased another 3 inches and mine, well lets just say when I sit down it flops over.

As a friend recently said to me "we are still breathing" so to all of us, long may that continue!

The hot sun has certainly warmed those ribs up and taken quite a lot of the normal meso pain from the highs to the lows on the 1 to 10 scale but the pain in my butt, sorry it is a pain, and down my leg every time I sit in a certain position is driving me to distraction.  I believe the rolling of the boat has helped with the bile as I don't feel so sick on a morning.  Wonder if hubby fancies moving into a canal boat for the rest of my life!

Seriously though I moan about the cold of home and how heat helps and it truly does but the pains still haunt us.  I'm talking about pain more today because catching the few bits I can on Facebook I see Debbie is really suffering and for her through this unpredictable journey of meso, it's a first.

I have suffered pain long before diagnosis and my heart feels heavy for her, there is no golden tablet that takes it all away, it hovers even with a large dose of morphine.  Our life's are just one long round of pain, once it stops in one area it starts in the next, each nerve fighting with the next to generate the most pain and be noticed by the brain to remind us how fragile our body really is.  Pain is the ultimate bug bear of this disease in my eyes.

So another new day of exploring for us, the one thing about cruising sometimes is we dock at industrial style ports and today is one of them, just tried taking a pic but can't on the iPad!  I have been pretty much out of contact, it seems strange not having email everyday or being on Facebook for a couple of hours, technology has taken over my life.  I brought my 2nd book to edit but have I not read much, on a cruise you don't seem to find reading time.  We have made friends with some amazing people which has been wonderful.  We were supposed to have dinner with the Captain last night but were ordered to ditch him so we could all eat again together, today will be our first day alone as our new found friends have booked tours so maybe I might just get some proof reading done.

Good news too, if I haven't already posted, Debbie has also been asked to be an ambassador for Mkmrf, Hopefully this will make the charity more well known in the South of England, again helping bring more funds to keeping the tissue bank open.  

Oh well, it's a hard life for some of us, had better think about showering and having breakfast, how is it you eat much more on holiday than you ever do at home?  Hubby's pot belly has increased another 3 inches and mine, well lets just say when I sit down it flops over.

As a friend recently said to me "we are still breathing" so to all of us, long may that continue!

The hot sun has certainly warmed those ribs up and taken quite a lot of the normal meso pain from the highs to the lows on the 1 to 10 scale but the pain in my butt, sorry it is a pain, and down my leg every time I sit in a certain position is driving me to distraction.  I believe the rolling of the boat has helped with the bile as I don't feel so sick on a morning.  Wonder if hubby fancies moving into a canal boat for the rest of my life!

Seriously though I moan about the cold of home and how heat helps and it truly does but the pains still haunt us.  I'm talking about pain more today because catching the few bits I can on Facebook I see Debbie is really suffering and for her through this unpredictable journey of meso, it's a first.

I have suffered pain long before diagnosis and my heart feels heavy for her, there is no golden tablet that takes it all away, it hovers even with a large dose of morphine.  Our life's are just one long round of pain, once it stops in one area it starts in the next, each nerve fighting with the next to generate the most pain and be noticed by the brain to remind us how fragile our body really is.  Pain is the ultimate bug bear of this disease in my eyes.

So another new day of exploring for us, the one thing about cruising sometimes is we dock at industrial style ports and today is one of them, just tried taking a pic but can't on the iPad!  I have been pretty much out of contact, it seems strange not having email everyday or being on Facebook for a couple of hours, technology has taken over my life.  I brought my 2nd book to edit but have I not read much, on a cruise you don't seem to find reading time.  We have made friends with some amazing people which has been wonderful.  We were supposed to have dinner with the Captain last night but were ordered to ditch him so we could all eat again together, today will be our first day alone as our new found friends have booked tours so maybe I might just get some proof reading done.

Good news too, if I haven't already posted, Debbie has also been asked to be an ambassador for Mkmrf, Hopefully this will make the charity more well known in the South of England, again helping bring more funds to keeping the tissue bank open.  

Oh well, it's a hard life for some of us, had better think about showering and having breakfast, how is it you eat much more on holiday than you ever do at home?  Hubby's pot belly has increased another 3 inches and mine, well lets just say when I sit down it flops over.

As a friend recently said to me "we are still breathing" so to all of us, long may that continue!

mesothelioma-Sunshine and cool breeze- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-Sunshine and cool breeze- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-Sunshine and cool breeze- JUSTICEWORLD

I feel naughty saying how beautiful it was feeling that heat on my bones yesterday.  We docked at Kusadasi but stayed on board.  The gauntlet of getting through the duty free shopping centre put us off, apparently the vendors chase you all the way, certainly not something hubby enjoys.  But we came for heat more than anything else and yes my bones soaked it up, although my muscle/nerve hasn't improved.

We have intermittent Internet service so have had a hard time downloading Facebook although I have logged in I can't see anything just keeps loading.  To my fellow warrior Mavis I hope she has digested her bad news and put some plan of action into her thoughts.  Being told your meso is back is never easy then wondering what you can do is harder still.  We don't have the choices on treatments that others have.  I know I put back my own treatment when the meso was back in 2010, but again each case is different, hence making mesothelioma the killer cancer.

Well we have just docked after sailing all night, Mykonos looks quite inviting, when I worked on Santorini a friend worked here but that was some 28 years ago (at least) like all islands changes will have occurred.

Better get ready, breakfast then off to discover the island.

News from the med signing off.

I feel naughty saying how beautiful it was feeling that heat on my bones yesterday.  We docked at Kusadasi but stayed on board.  The gauntlet of getting through the duty free shopping centre put us off, apparently the vendors chase you all the way, certainly not something hubby enjoys.  But we came for heat more than anything else and yes my bones soaked it up, although my muscle/nerve hasn't improved.

We have intermittent Internet service so have had a hard time downloading Facebook although I have logged in I can't see anything just keeps loading.  To my fellow warrior Mavis I hope she has digested her bad news and put some plan of action into her thoughts.  Being told your meso is back is never easy then wondering what you can do is harder still.  We don't have the choices on treatments that others have.  I know I put back my own treatment when the meso was back in 2010, but again each case is different, hence making mesothelioma the killer cancer.

Well we have just docked after sailing all night, Mykonos looks quite inviting, when I worked on Santorini a friend worked here but that was some 28 years ago (at least) like all islands changes will have occurred.

Better get ready, breakfast then off to discover the island.

News from the med signing off.

I feel naughty saying how beautiful it was feeling that heat on my bones yesterday.  We docked at Kusadasi but stayed on board.  The gauntlet of getting through the duty free shopping centre put us off, apparently the vendors chase you all the way, certainly not something hubby enjoys.  But we came for heat more than anything else and yes my bones soaked it up, although my muscle/nerve hasn't improved.

We have intermittent Internet service so have had a hard time downloading Facebook although I have logged in I can't see anything just keeps loading.  To my fellow warrior Mavis I hope she has digested her bad news and put some plan of action into her thoughts.  Being told your meso is back is never easy then wondering what you can do is harder still.  We don't have the choices on treatments that others have.  I know I put back my own treatment when the meso was back in 2010, but again each case is different, hence making mesothelioma the killer cancer.

Well we have just docked after sailing all night, Mykonos looks quite inviting, when I worked on Santorini a friend worked here but that was some 28 years ago (at least) like all islands changes will have occurred.

Better get ready, breakfast then off to discover the island.

News from the med signing off.

mesothelioma-The Joys of Packing- JUSTICEWORLD

- Hi friends, At this time sharing entitled , I have provided a complete article about mesothelioma

Title : mesothelioma-The Joys of Packing- JUSTICEWORLD
post : mesothelioma-The Joys of Packing- JUSTICEWORLD

I still can't shake this mood of doom or get off my backside and be active.  But today I did pack, early for me as I normally do it the night before.  I'm just afraid that after work tomorrow I will feel like just wanting to sit and stare at the computer screen.

 

I have pushed myself and finished correcting the first draft of the next book, that has also been downloaded to my kindle so I can read it on hols and mark any further errors.  At least my bad memory is good for something as I had forgotten the story and the ending, the last few chapters I was on the end of my seat wondering how it was going to come together!

 

Another worry about my memory is my book is advertised for pre-order on Amazon as a paperback, I can't remember doing that, nor can I get into an account to see how I did it or more importantly, who has pre-ordered it.  I am getting a little worried but hubby keeps brushing it off by saying I am over tired.

 

My leg also is getting worse, thinking I have a trapped nerve in there, I daren't let my imagine take hold, just in case.  Although last night I made myself sleep on my back and didn't place a pillow in between my knees.  I got into this habit when I was so thin that my bony knees rested on each other.  At least my bloods came back ok but I am having a few little ripples of pain in the third boob and right back, I have to hope that my short cycle of alimta works for longer than the last time, 4 months stability isn't long enough for any of us.

 

I actually got out with the dogs in the fields yesterday, the sun shone and the breeze was warm, I couldn't believe it, nor could the dogs both stayed by my side the whole time.  I left hubby with his camera and went for a walk in the woods, spying a couple of deer I tried to keep the dogs quiet but Lexi started singing, (yes she sings) and they heard so I watched them spring away in the distance.  It was good though, we were out about 90 minutes and it filled me with a I need sun and today was just a taste. 

 

I hope the weather will be nice when we arrive on Tuesday and no storms at sea, on Friday I caught up with an old friend.  She owns a spa called Broom Mill Spa about 10 minutes away but I haven't made the effort to go for nearly 3 years.  I was greeted like VIP when I arrived, it was great catching up, the children have grown so much I didn't recognise them as they came to give me a hug.  Both daughters are truly beautiful young ladies.  I got my finger nails and toe nails done as well as waxing those eye brows.  We are both to blame for the absence in seeing each other, she has been busy keeping the Spa busy in this economic down turn together with running around after the children etc, although we both keep meaning to get in touch something called life can get in the way.  I have promised once I get back I will at least see her once a month.  Mind saying that I said that to my two best friends, So far this year I can count on one hand the amount of times we have been together.

 

Hubby told me today he has managed to lose half a stone, I have managed to lose a lb, still I have packed a couple of pair of tight summer trousers, you never know I may still lose a few more so I can wear them!  I hope he can carry on losing it would do him the world of good, like me it is all on his belly!  I should have had it written into our marriage vows, and no fat stomachs!

 

One last word, I hope Mavis gets a good result tomorrow, I know she is worried, as we do, we can only hope her stable inactive continues, and if you are receiving results yourselves, I hope you get the same.

I still can't shake this mood of doom or get off my backside and be active.  But today I did pack, early for me as I normally do it the night before.  I'm just afraid that after work tomorrow I will feel like just wanting to sit and stare at the computer screen.

 

I have pushed myself and finished correcting the first draft of the next book, that has also been downloaded to my kindle so I can read it on hols and mark any further errors.  At least my bad memory is good for something as I had forgotten the story and the ending, the last few chapters I was on the end of my seat wondering how it was going to come together!

 

Another worry about my memory is my book is advertised for pre-order on Amazon as a paperback, I can't remember doing that, nor can I get into an account to see how I did it or more importantly, who has pre-ordered it.  I am getting a little worried but hubby keeps brushing it off by saying I am over tired.

 

My leg also is getting worse, thinking I have a trapped nerve in there, I daren't let my imagine take hold, just in case.  Although last night I made myself sleep on my back and didn't place a pillow in between my knees.  I got into this habit when I was so thin that my bony knees rested on each other.  At least my bloods came back ok but I am having a few little ripples of pain in the third boob and right back, I have to hope that my short cycle of alimta works for longer than the last time, 4 months stability isn't long enough for any of us.

 

I actually got out with the dogs in the fields yesterday, the sun shone and the breeze was warm, I couldn't believe it, nor could the dogs both stayed by my side the whole time.  I left hubby with his camera and went for a walk in the woods, spying a couple of deer I tried to keep the dogs quiet but Lexi started singing, (yes she sings) and they heard so I watched them spring away in the distance.  It was good though, we were out about 90 minutes and it filled me with a I need sun and today was just a taste. 

 

I hope the weather will be nice when we arrive on Tuesday and no storms at sea, on Friday I caught up with an old friend.  She owns a spa called Broom Mill Spa about 10 minutes away but I haven't made the effort to go for nearly 3 years.  I was greeted like VIP when I arrived, it was great catching up, the children have grown so much I didn't recognise them as they came to give me a hug.  Both daughters are truly beautiful young ladies.  I got my finger nails and toe nails done as well as waxing those eye brows.  We are both to blame for the absence in seeing each other, she has been busy keeping the Spa busy in this economic down turn together with running around after the children etc, although we both keep meaning to get in touch something called life can get in the way.  I have promised once I get back I will at least see her once a month.  Mind saying that I said that to my two best friends, So far this year I can count on one hand the amount of times we have been together.

 

Hubby told me today he has managed to lose half a stone, I have managed to lose a lb, still I have packed a couple of pair of tight summer trousers, you never know I may still lose a few more so I can wear them!  I hope he can carry on losing it would do him the world of good, like me it is all on his belly!  I should have had it written into our marriage vows, and no fat stomachs!

 

One last word, I hope Mavis gets a good result tomorrow, I know she is worried, as we do, we can only hope her stable inactive continues, and if you are receiving results yourselves, I hope you get the same.

I still can't shake this mood of doom or get off my backside and be active.  But today I did pack, early for me as I normally do it the night before.  I'm just afraid that after work tomorrow I will feel like just wanting to sit and stare at the computer screen.

 

I have pushed myself and finished correcting the first draft of the next book, that has also been downloaded to my kindle so I can read it on hols and mark any further errors.  At least my bad memory is good for something as I had forgotten the story and the ending, the last few chapters I was on the end of my seat wondering how it was going to come together!

 

Another worry about my memory is my book is advertised for pre-order on Amazon as a paperback, I can't remember doing that, nor can I get into an account to see how I did it or more importantly, who has pre-ordered it.  I am getting a little worried but hubby keeps brushing it off by saying I am over tired.

 

My leg also is getting worse, thinking I have a trapped nerve in there, I daren't let my imagine take hold, just in case.  Although last night I made myself sleep on my back and didn't place a pillow in between my knees.  I got into this habit when I was so thin that my bony knees rested on each other.  At least my bloods came back ok but I am having a few little ripples of pain in the third boob and right back, I have to hope that my short cycle of alimta works for longer than the last time, 4 months stability isn't long enough for any of us.

 

I actually got out with the dogs in the fields yesterday, the sun shone and the breeze was warm, I couldn't believe it, nor could the dogs both stayed by my side the whole time.  I left hubby with his camera and went for a walk in the woods, spying a couple of deer I tried to keep the dogs quiet but Lexi started singing, (yes she sings) and they heard so I watched them spring away in the distance.  It was good though, we were out about 90 minutes and it filled me with a I need sun and today was just a taste. 

 

I hope the weather will be nice when we arrive on Tuesday and no storms at sea, on Friday I caught up with an old friend.  She owns a spa called Broom Mill Spa about 10 minutes away but I haven't made the effort to go for nearly 3 years.  I was greeted like VIP when I arrived, it was great catching up, the children have grown so much I didn't recognise them as they came to give me a hug.  Both daughters are truly beautiful young ladies.  I got my finger nails and toe nails done as well as waxing those eye brows.  We are both to blame for the absence in seeing each other, she has been busy keeping the Spa busy in this economic down turn together with running around after the children etc, although we both keep meaning to get in touch something called life can get in the way.  I have promised once I get back I will at least see her once a month.  Mind saying that I said that to my two best friends, So far this year I can count on one hand the amount of times we have been together.

 

Hubby told me today he has managed to lose half a stone, I have managed to lose a lb, still I have packed a couple of pair of tight summer trousers, you never know I may still lose a few more so I can wear them!  I hope he can carry on losing it would do him the world of good, like me it is all on his belly!  I should have had it written into our marriage vows, and no fat stomachs!

 

One last word, I hope Mavis gets a good result tomorrow, I know she is worried, as we do, we can only hope her stable inactive continues, and if you are receiving results yourselves, I hope you get the same.